Secrecy of Regrets

31 Hell Nervous!

31 Hell Nervous!

I am nervous.

"Why the hell are you nervous? It's not your first time going to college. You are a Certified Public Accountant for god's sake!"

"Thank you for reminding me Charlotte." I revert back.

"You didn't have breakfast. You are barely talking since morning."

Suddenly we jerked forward due to Jack's excellent driving skill. Ethan would have spilled all his latte to car's dashboard, if it wasn't for the cap over his glass.

"We are 30 minutes early, so we'll have breakfast first. I and Ethan skipped our breakfast." Ohh it was the reason for his sudden break.

"You guys can have your breakfast. Charlotte will take your car to give me a ride to college." Charlotte was looking at Jack and Ethan to avoid me.

"Isn't it, Charlotte?" I deliberately mentioned her.

"Ohh, What were you saying?"

"Ohh that, we are going for your wedding shopping today!" I replied sarcastically.

This time Ethan successfully spilled all the latte from his mouth and started coughing like crazy. I shrugged thinking 'You guys invited it yourself.'

"I will not allow Charlotte to drive my Car and not allow any of you-"

"I will go on cab from here. Thank you." I declared and saying my goodbye to Charlotte I climbed down the car. This time car door was not locked. I heard faint sound of cursing. I couldn't decipher the voice but I ignored it.

I went to opposite direction of car. As I was about to halt a cab, someone dragged me from the road side and into the café which was merely at five steps distance. With the firm grip I know who he was.

I just cannot allow him to do this to me. He is not a main character of any book nor is I the girl who will obey every time to this demon of a man. I waited patiently until he confirms that I was not going anywhere. Jack and Ethan were busy giving order at the counter. I took this chance and got out of the café avoiding Charlotte's protest. I ran to the road side and to my luck the cab was available. I climbed into the cab giving driver the address and we drove off.

I was angry.

I was hell nervous.

I was angry on a first day of college.

Just because that Jerk thinks he can order anyone. I am not anyone. I am not Charlotte and definitely don't need his protection. I am not Ethan to listen to his Best Friends order. He is not my best friend even.

'But he is your friend.'

Okay... But he definitely cannot order around, Can he?

My trail of thoughts got interrupted when my destination arrived. I paid the bill and stand at the massive gates just staring. It is not my country. They are not local people speaking in my native language. Back in India, I could make out of the first day of college just because I had my friend from school that opted same stream as me. And here – in Amsterdam I will have to start from scrap.

And I am piece of a crap in this field. Charlotte, Ethan and Jack are exception that has ever happened to me. How am I going to make it out of these whole two years!

"That's why we decided to come with you and you ran away!" Charlotte's voice echoed in my ears. I have developed weird habit having her around and now I am hearing voices.

I am still staring at people entering to college drumming my fingers on my chick.

"This is a MESS!" I exclaimed.

"Urghhh... This girl!" And with that someone turned me around. I was not hearing voices but the voice belonged to Charlotte herself. I looked at three nuts. Ethan shook his head in disapproval. Well, Jack – Jack was furious.

"You are still fifteen minutes early. Breakfast wouldn't have harmed you. And you could have simply waited." Jack said in hissed tone as if trying to control his anger which I don't care a bit.

"Of course. These two people dragged me out of the café. I couldn't enjoy my delicious breakfast. You could have sat with us or could just have shared your breakfast with me." Ethan's disapproving look was for his Breakfast.

"I generally don't eat anything when there is some special day or event. If I eat something I just feel nauseous. And I wanted to make it early to make myself comfortable or ready?" I specifically directed my last sentence to Jack narrowing my eyes.

"You could have told us-" Jack tried to explain himself but I cut him off.

"Told you what exactly? That I cannot be comfortable with new people even if they are not bad or that I was planning to go directly to the department head ask for my schedules and make to it to the class avoiding every pair of eyes who will come across my way?" I couldn't control my anger which I really need to do.

What if I blurt out the things I don't want anyone to know! My eyes widen on realization. I would loss this amazing friendship just because of my fear. I need to control this. I have always controlled – why now?

"I am really sorry. I didn't want to snap on you guys. I couldn't help it. I am so sorry. It's just that no one is here from my family and friends from India. I have never been in such a situation. I came here being so brave in front of my family; I just can't take it normally. I am sorry." I sincerely apologized.

Charlotte hugged me in comfort. Ethan came near probably taking his chance on Charlotte, he rubbed my back. Charlotte released me from hug and took a look at Jack and he nodded in understanding.

"Let's rock it!" Our beaming Charlotte is back!

Ethan and Jack took their position beside me and Charlotte as making a grand entry. We entered to college. Students were busy in their usual college life- riding cycle or skates, handling piles of books, couple making out – Yuck!, Friends groups mocking each other. My nervousness came down to reasonable level that I can handle.  

But as we came to view of people out in middle of campus, people started to give some strange, confused or surprise looks? I follow most followed direction and that landed on NONE OTHER THAN JACK AND ETHAN!!!

***

14-07-2019

Jiyana is bundle of nervousness today!!! Why is she so desperate to hide 'The things'? 

Did jack's sudden stop of car have any relation to Jiyana? Did he stop the car just because he heard Jiyana hadn't have breakfast?

Now let's see whether this grand entry of Jiyana accompanied by the 'Trio' is going is to ease out her nervousness or will simply add fuel to the fire?

Happy Reading!!!