Where Am I? (boyxboy)

Chapter Six

Hello! Well here's the next chapter. How was that for a surprise? Alec is such a cutie. Comment, vote whatever you feel like.

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I stared at Alec in shock, then coughed. "You loved him?" I asked sheepishly. Oh this whole situation was getting better and better. Note sarcasm. He nodded, looking miserable.

For a moment Alec looked absolutely horrified at his confession. Slowly his shoulders slumped and his face drained of color. He was doing just as well as I was. I felt the need to wrap my arms around him and smooth down his perfectly messed, chocolate hair. Immediately my brain buzzed with the thought, until reality set in and I was left with a cold need and an empty wanting.

"Fuck. I don't know why I'm telling you this." He exclaimed, letting out a choked laugh as he looked at me.

"Why are you telling me?" I asked softly. I was in the danger zone. Abort, abort! But my body didn't listen to my brain's logic. Leaning in closer, I could feel Alec's breath on my neck as it grew ragged. He looked into my eyes, not really seeing me. As he stared into space he said quietly, "I don't know." He took a deep breath then took a step back. "He never knew of my feelings for him." You got that right. "But there's not a day that goes by that I don't miss him. First love and all." He smiled bitterly at me before stepping another foot away. With each step he took, I felt my heart twinge painfully in my chest. Couldn't I tell him?

Thoughts whirled inside my brain, all the possibilities and outcomes of telling my ex best friend who I was. He could tell the entire school, not the best thing for me. He could welcome me back with open arms. Worst come to worse, he could hate me. I wouldn't be able to stand that. So with a new resolve, I too, took a step away from the boy who had once loved me, and if I wasn't kidding myself, kind of wish still did.

"The bell rang a while ago." I stated, the monotone coming back into my voice. I shoved past Alec, needing to get away from him before I just spilled all my secrets, letting him know I was right here. He caught me arm as I passed him and whispered pleadingly, "You won't tell?" I nodded my head a fraction, being this close to those gorgeous lips of his was not helping my dilemma. Letting me go, I hurried back to class, which was already half over.

I couldn't think about numbers, much less calculus, Alec's words effected me much more than I could let on. Not only did I have one heartbroken ex girlfriend I had a heartbroken best friend to seal the deal. Oh my life was so messed up. What the hell did I do to deserve this type of test? Someone up there really had it in for me. I bet it was Mom, she always was a hard ass. They probably were just pissed about me hiding my identity. I could almost hear her, 'Dawson is the name I gave you and it's the name you'll use.' I shook my head, sadness and fond memories swirling into one. The blood in my veins began to buzz. My blood aching to be released. It was the call of the blade.

The bell broke me from my thoughts. I sighed in relief as the feeling dulled itself out for now. I refused to succumb at school, there was no need for that. Standing up, I rolled my shoulders, wincing at the pain but thankful for the stretch it offered. Grabbing my bag I shoved my book and notes in a flash. I was out the door, heading to lunch. The shark tank of high school. As I walked in I whipped my head around for Emelia.

She wasn't in the lunch line, wasn't at our table, wasn't by the entrance. Then something from the corner of my eye caught my attention, two figures in a shadowy corner. Tyler was pressing a girl against the wall, holding her wrists by her ears as he advanced. Suddenly having a sick feeling I hurried over to the two of them. Recognizing Emelia's dyed hair and leather shorts with lace tights underneath she was wearing this morning, I quickened my pace arriving just in time to hear Tyler say, "Come on Emelia, I know you haven't gotten any lately. Why not just let it happen?" He cooed in her ear.