My Personal Virus (A BEN Drowned x Reader fanfic)

Haunted

(Bloody Painter)

Months, that was how long I suffered from my thoughts in silence. To this day I was still worried sick, but then I realized she was meant to be dead. It angered me to think about how attached I am, our interaction was supposed to mean nothing but here I am craving for it. I had to stay away for her safety, but then I realized I'm only doing it for nothing since she'll die soon anyway. 

The room was scattered with papers, paintbrushes were everywhere as well as some crumpled papers. I feel like I'm in a mental institution, I rarely go out anymore, it's not that important. I couldn't count the nights that I skipped without sleeping, it slightly amazed me how long I stayed wide awake. 

Soon I gave up, I finally got over this stupid phase, reality eventually punched me in the face. I sat up from my messy and kinda stinky bed, my head wanted to keep me occupied with thoughts about fixing myself and starting all over again. I took a deep breath before finally twisting the doorknob and opening the door, the smell of bacon and eggs hits my nose. Slowly I walked out after shutting the door behind me, I took my time to go down the stairs carefully. Food was on my mind so I decided to look for something to consume. There was only one person in the kitchen, unfortunately, it had to be that bastard. I simply stood there for seconds before moving towards the refrigerator, once I opened it, I was greeted with various foods from sandwiches to bowls of decent looking pasta. I furrowed my eyebrows at this but then I heard a chuckle behind me.

"How's life inside your cave?"

His voice was teasing me, I decided to just play it nice and cold with him. I shut the refrigerator door as I finally faced him with the most unpleased expression I can pull out. The elf looked the same but there was something that made me think that he changed, it wasn't the tray of food that was in his hands but rather the unknown reason for him holding it.

"You don't want to know much, it's better for you to just shut up"

"That's fine, it's not like I'm interested in you wasting your life thinking about her"

Something snapped inside me when he mentioned [Name], luckily I chose to ignore it and just let him leave without a fight. BEN snickered at me, before smirking his way up the stairs. 

No matter how much I convince myself that I don't care about her anymore, my head screamed for me to run and go see her even if it's just once. My legs eventually found its way up the stairs accompanied by my heart beating fast. My eyes landed on the familiar door that was half opened, I told myself to stop but it only failed. Slowly and quietly I crept towards the door before I finally peeked through. My eyes stared with shock and disbelief, words were not enough to describe how much I hated the sight.

They were sitting on the bed, inches apart. [Name] was eating peacefully while the elf stared at her oddly. The thing I didn't like was her pausing from eating just to glance back at him, from this far I can see the new way she would stare at him. Soon I realized I was just jealous over something I can't have, it's pathetic but painfull. Eventually, I pulled away and decided to just forget what I saw and simply move on with the life I have, I fucking hate it when I'm lying to myself.

~

I didn't eat much because of the unpleasant mood I had, it was incredibly annoying and hard to remove. Eventually, I'm back in my room with a garbage bag in hand, hopefully cleaning my room would be enough to distract or get rid of this stupid feeling in my chest. One by one I picked the pieces of crumpled paper from the floor, it didn't take long for me to finish. Next, I organized my art supplies then placed it to its respectful places. What it felt like less than thirty minutes, I was done with cleaning my room including changing the bedsheets.