Heartless

2

Target is an amusement park for people who love to shop. Kat dragged me around the store and pulled clothes for me to wear. She loved to shop whereas I hated it. I was never comfortable with my body. When I would bend over you could see my ribs, and my arms and legs always looked lanky and bone-like to me. People have told me I have a desirable body, an hourglass figure, but I only see the negatives in it. I just assume everyone else sees it that way too.

"I think this would look so good on you." Kat said as she held up a black dress with little cutouts on the side. I grabbed it without arguing, Kat usually won little arguments with me, she's very sweet and smart, but she also has a fire behind her and she won't let up if she believes in something. After walking around for a bit we made our way to the dressing rooms. I scanned my options and started off slow with a crop top, Jean short combo. I scoffed at the mirror. It's not worth the money. I thought to myself. I had the same reaction to everything, until I reached the black dress that Kat had picked out for me. It felt like it was made for my body, the length of it fell perfectly on my thigh, the cutouts hid my rib cage and accentuated my breasts in the best way possible. I felt good. Really good. "Kat you're a genius!" I yelled over the next room. "I know that!" She giggled, "why this time?" She said and opened her door. I opened the door to the dressing room and stepped out wearing the dress. She smiled so wide, "you look so good!" She said giddily, "how do you feel in it?" She said turning serious, she knew I had a hard time with my body and honestly with my confidence in general. "I feel really good." I said feeling tears start to form in my eyes. I sucked the tears in and pushed forward. I never cried, as it showed I was weak.

When we got back to Kat's place we only had an hour or so before we had to go. I showered quickly and then did my hair. I decided to go with a half up half down look and curled it. Kat was really good at makeup so I let her work her magic on me. By the end of the hour we looked like completely different people. "I told Sam we would come early, we can carpool if you want, and you can just stay the night here." I was off tomorrow so I simply nodded and grabbed my bag.

The house we pulled up to was HUGE, at least 7 bedrooms. I instantly tensed up, socializing is really hard for me, I feel like I just don't fit in, and if I do fit in then they get sick of me and leave. They Always Leave.

"Hey babe." Sam said and kissed Katrina once we entered the house. I had met Sam a couple times before, "Hey Cora" he said and gave me a quick hug. "Let me introduce you to the guys." He said to me  and escorted both of us through the living room. They all greeted Kat with hugs, "guys this is Kat's friend from work, Cora." I flashed a quick smile and wave, I examined them all as they introduced themselves.

"Hi I'm Corey" one of them said and held out a hand. He was more built than the the rest of them, he has big brown eyes and a small brown man bun sitting on top of his head. I went to shake his hand and he laughed, "you're so formal! Let me show you." He said and gave me a 'bro handshake' I liked his energy.

"Jake" the one with bright white hair said as he lifted his hand in front of my face, his voice was deeper than expected. He was sporting some painted nails, he was every emo girls fantasy. I gave him a high five and he smiled.

"I'm Colby." The last one said. He has swooping brown hair with little hints of bluish green peaking through, the blue streaks made his ocean blue eyes pop. His voice was also quiet deep. He wasn't as emo fantasy as Jake but he was a close second. He just waved to me and looked as if he was examining everything about me. He seemed almost intimidating, but goofy at the same time.

"It's nice to meet you all" I said softly and brushed my hair behind my ear. We had come early because Kat wanted to spend more time with Sam but eventually the house completely filled up. You couldn't really stand without someone bumping into you, "Hey Cora! I'm gonna go outside with Sam will you be okay in here?!" Kat said yelling over the music and shaking my arm a bit. 'No.' I thought to myself. My anxiety was taking over me. I never wanted to ruin her fun though so I said, "of course have fun" with a smile. She left my side and my anxiety heightened tenfold. I knew alcohol would help a little bit, but I didn't want to get sloppy. I never ever wanted to be sloppy, especially here.

"Hey" I heard someone say in my ear. "Can I get you something to drink?" A tall brunette said to me. I didn't recognize him, "uh sure!" I said trying to let loose a little bit. I was always too scared to lighten up. I don't trust people usually. "I'm Jason!" He said kindly as he escorted me through the crowd by gently placing his hand on the small of my back. I immediately felt uncomfortable but I had to realize that breaking out of my shell would never be comfortable.