Heartless

20

I woke up on his chest, I couldn't believe what we had done last night. When I'm under the influence I'm fearless. My head moved with his chest as he breathed, it was comforting but, I still felt myself start to panic. It was common for me to feel this way when anyone showed me any affection. So the fact that last night happened, meant that I was in for a rude awakening today. I slowly sat up trying not to wake Colby up. He was glowing as he slept, I thought about staying a minute and laying back down but my stomach churned as I began to feel sick. I quickly pulled on my underwear and Colby's T-shirt and ran to the bathroom. I fell to the floor, letting all the alcohol in my system spew out into the toilet. I began to cry as my chest tightened up. I suddenly couldn't breathe. I shouldn't have done that last night. It was so out of character for me. The room spun as a light knock was heard coming from the door. "Cora..." Colby said quietly then opened the door.

He sat down next to me and pulled me into his lap, he held my head to his chest and wiped the hair that was sticking to my forehead. I clawed at his arms, signaling that I couldn't breathe. "You're okay you're okay, I got you" He said softly as we rocked back and forth. I couldn't help but cry into his chest. "I'm s-sorry" I said through my sobs. "It's okay baby." He said as he picked me up and walked me to the bedroom, and onto the bed.

"It's okay baby, I know it's hard for you." He said genuinely. Nobody understood me the way he did, he held me in his arms as I began to try and calm down, my breathing was spuratic at best. I flinched as he moved to put his hand on my back, "Sh Sh, I've got you, I'm not going to hurt you." He said softly as he kissed the top of my head. I eventually calmed down and was drawing little circles with my finger on his bare chest. "Do you want some breakfast?" He said and played with my hair. "Can we lay like this for a little?" I said glancing up at him. He looked down at me and smiled warmly, "of course" he said then placed a gentle peck on my lips.

"I'm sorry I kissed Jen last night." He said softly causing me to chuckle. "I let you. She was thirsty and obviously needed the attention." I said causing him to gasp, then laugh. "And plus it was only fair since you kissed Tara." I slapped his chest lightly, "oh you loved it though." I said and he shrugged, "maybe." He said then winked at me.

We laid like that for an hour or so before we finally got out of bed. "Where do you want breakfast?" I said pulling my jeans on. "Honestly.....ihop." He said putting his pants on, "I know it's garbage but it's the perfect morning after food" he slipped on a hoodie. "Should we invite Sam and Kat?" I said as I went to his closet picking out a sweater to wear. "If they are alive" he said with a chuckle and went to knock on Sam's door.

I looked in the mirror, the bags under my eyes were intense, I can't believe Colby would think I'm attractive enough to go to breakfast with me right now. "They are coming...they need this breakfast more than we do" He said laughing. He came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me, looking at me through the mirror. "God, you're beautiful." He said in a mesmerized tone. "Shut up!" I said slapping his arm lightly, "I look like i just got beat up." He turned me around and put his fingers lightly under my chin, "I think you're drop dead gorgeous." I couldn't help but smile as he tilted my head down and kissed my forehead. "Alright! Let's go!" He said and smacked my butt playfully then walked out of the room. I closely followed as I saw Kat in the bathroom, she looked ROUGH. But who was I to judge I also looked pretty rough.

Sam looked as rough as Katrina did. They went really hard last night, "Do you guys even remember inviting us to come to bed with you?" Colby said causing the two of them to look at eachother and laugh, "uh no!" Kat said cackling. "But we did however hear YOU guys at 3am..." Sam said causing my cheeks to get hot. "To our defense we thought you guys would be out cold" Colby said and pursed his lips as he drove. The energy in the car was light, we were all recovering from our crazy night but we found it easier to joke than focus on how shitty we felt.

As we ate, Colby and I caught Sam and Kat up on what happened at the party last night. "You kissed Tara?" Kat said with her eyebrows raised, "Who are you?!" She said as I shrugged with a smile. "And Jen the psycho kissed you Colby?" Sam said making Colby chuckle, "yeah, and she really is a psycho." I nodded in agreement as I ate my pancakes. I really took in this moment. I was really happy, I had an amazing boyfriend, I great best friend, and a friend group. I never had a friend group like this one. I needed to really take in this moment because nothing lasts.

Happiness never lasts.