Thoughts Of The Mind

Second Guessing

"That's stupid Brianna. I can't believe you would say that, are you jealous?"

The conversation played over in my head like a bad song on repeat. It was then that the trouble started. Looking back I now recall seeing a strange glint in her eyes one, which at the time I couldn't quite pinpoint. I now realise it was a look of disgust possibly hate towards me. Why I will never know as I was just doing what I thought a good friends would, but boy was I wrong. They say that friends are the family you choose but what happens when you become insure of the decision you make? I guess you could say that's how I feeling right about now.

Giving up I on the paper I am trying to write I stroll over to my bad to lay down and get lost in my thoughts.

We haven't been friends for the long, nor do we share the same group of friends, but somehow we became, and have stayed close over the past few months. Annalise soon become acquaintance with those at the higher end of the school hierarchy and made her mark. I on the other hand stayed within my comfort zone, surrounded by those I was comfortable with. Not that I'm a recluse I'm just one of those girls who never really breaks out of her shell.

As Annalise climbed the social ladder we still managed to stay friends. We met up every now and again usually on the weekends. I wouldn't say she was ashamed of me just cautious, maybe that was the same thing. Maybe I should have read the warning signs earlier. Too late there is no going back now. What's done is done. I was so wrapped up in the thought of proving to myself that not all social royalty were the same, I guess I was wrong.

Soon after becoming popular Annalise got the stereotypical accessory, the boyfriend. Damion Weeks. To say that Damion and I didn't see eye to eye was an understatement. Neighbours for years Damion and I had been childhood best friends. As cliché as it sounds we really did do most things together. That was up until secondary school. As a kid Damion was cute, as a teenage boy he was a head turner, even I cannot fail to admit that. With the growing status along came his cocky attitude and the bond between us began to sever I went one way whilst her went another. As the social gap grew so did the teasing. At times I thought I could see a glimpse of the old Damion, the one I had come to grow and love but it was soon drowned out with the ever present glare of social standing.

Most people say I should learn from my past. Truth be told I was adamant Annalise was different turns of girls are a whole lot bitchier. Things were fine at first, sure I saw less of Annalise but she would always make an effort to hang out or so I thought. Turns out she built me up just to crash me back down

Everyone was ecstatic for the new couple, I on the other hand knew better. We may not have been as close as before but I could still read Damion pretty well. He was flirtatious and loved having a good time and from what I could see not all to committed to any long term relationship. Annalise was sure they would last and from the brief conversations we had had over the past weeks I knew she was falling fast. Damion on the other hand had other plans.

Just as I had predicted he soon got bored. When walking through the school grounds on various occasions I would see his tell tale mop of shaggy brown locks sneak behind the bike shed or cafeteria with a pretty brunette or red head, for a few moments of who knows what. As in my face as it was Annalise seemed to be left in the dark about things. Paraded around like a public trophy she willingly sucked face with Damion on a daily basis in public. Either Annalise was walking round with blinkers on, sat it a pit of denial or she was just oblivious to the fact that her so called 'Boyfriend' wasn't being very faithful.

Sick of seeing her being played I made up my mind to confront her. That is where things went pear shaped. It was a couple weeks back when I had laid it upon myself to tell her about her boyfriend's unfaithfulness was and it couldn't have gone more wrong.