14: Self

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Im nOt finE after noticiNg

1) 69 reAds iM haLf caCkling haLf crYing

2) 13 vOtes i love you, love you and love you again. times Infinity 

3) douBle update dedicateD to @guntaskb what did I do to deserve you 🥺🥺🥺 number two applies to you esp 💕

4) thE PICTURE ABOVE OKAY I NEED HOLY WATER WHERE IS IT WHY DID HOBI DO THIS DO ME WHY WHY WHY

enjoyyyyy

***

Rivulets of tears running down her cheeks, face and neck, she bit into her own hand. 

So hard that blood slowly oozed out from the wound, a metal taste forming in her mouth. She sucked the blood away, wrapping her hand in her long sleeved T-shirt. A fusillade of thought trickled into her mind. Jin. Tae. Her mother. Blood. The men she had killed. Kidnapping. The wrongs. Second. Food. Jin. Jin. Jin. Kim Seokjin.

He would never understand why she was like that. Neither would her friends when they found out. No one. She would have almost killed him if she hadn't stopped herself, and she would never forgive herself for that. Right now, she was pretty sure Jin was scared of her. He would never understand her. He wouldn't come searching for her. She was a horrible person who killed other people and bit people. Who would want to befriend her? She was sure Jin would run away, staying as far away from her as possible. 

Her thoughts trailed back to herself. She only made friends because she acted like that. Because she pretended to be friendly, pretended to be cheerful, pretended to be the other person she was. But she was ugly. Her mother was a million times prettier than her. She was sure other people called her pretty because they were either intimidated by how famous her mother was, or out of kindness to console her. But this was Kim Jisoo, who would never be as loved or praised like her mother. She felt like she was living in the shadow of Jennie. Maybe that was why Jin tried to comfort her. To make her feel better about herself when she was not even good looking in the first place. 

What Jin said about himself wasn't true in his case. It was in her case. She was the one that was worthless, useless, helpless. She shouldn't have been living in this world where she killed people. Never. Jin could change and be a better person. But she couldn't. She was born that way.

She slumped against the fence, so deep in thoughts that she couldn't feel the pain pulsing in her arm, nor the little trickle of blood that ran down it. 

***

Jin saw her run. He didn't chase after her. 

He was tired too. And Jisoo was scary. The look she gave him when she neared him, no, Jin didn't want to think of it. Why was she like that? Jin was baffled. This wasn't the way normal people acted when they were hungry. Jin would whine for food. Others would be so weak they wouldn't talk. His father, Namjoon, would try to cook something at home, like instant noodles. But he would probably break the wooden chopsticks while cooking.

He needed some time to himself. When would his father find him? What was he doing right now? What happened to Jisoo after she ran away? Why did his thoughts keep revolving around her?

Would the two men who captured Jisoo find him?

He frowned. He realised that Jisoo was the one who had saved him from the guy with the knife in the mirror maze. And helped him out of the maze. And comforted him after that. She was the only one who could bring them down. He needed her. For protection.

"I need to find her." Jin whispered, ignoring the waver in his own voice. 

*** 

Jaewon burst into the metal maze, flinging the door open. The clang resounded loudly in the warehouse. He began to run.

***

Jisoo heard the sound. It was bad. Someone had entered the maze. Who? She didn't know. She needed to be alert. She pressed herself against the fence, breath haggard, mentally ticking off the minuted, then peeking out before she made any move.

***

Jin, from afar, heard it too. He panicked more, because Jisoo was nowhere in sight and for all he knew, another bad person could have entered. He picked up his pace. 

"Jisoo!" He whispered sharply. Silence answered him.

"Jisoo... please don't leave me..." he cried out softly, but his words were eaten up by silence.



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