Roadtrip Oneshots (BxB)

a year - jandy/fluff

trigger warning: mentions of death/car accidents... you get the theme here.

-x-

it had been a year.

jack pushed the curtains to their old room open, sunlight breaking the dreariness of the room. despite it being a winter day, the sky was bright and the sun shining happily. but no amount of sunshine could warm the cold and empty feeling he had in his heart. the andy shape hole that had been ripped out a year ago.

jack knew it was selfish for him to be feeling like this. he knew others around him were suffering from the loss of a friend, the loss of a role model, the loss of a brother but he couldn't bring himself to care. the numbness still hadn't gotten any better over the whole yesr since the accident.

"baby, i'm just going out. want anything?" Andy asked, poking his head round Jack's door. Jack smiled up at his older boyfriend and beckoned him over. he wrapped his as sercurely around the shorter man, kissing the top of his head.

"nah, i'm going to Westfield to get your present tomorrow anyway" Jack felt Andy hum against his chest, before pulling away.

"ok, well, i'll see you when i get back"

"i love youuu" he called childishly, hearing andy snort.

"yeah, love you too jacky"

the last words Andy said to him. because not even an hour later he was called and told Andy had been involved in a car accident. they told him that he died on impact, and that Andy wouldn't have felt a thing. Jack wasn't sure if that was meant to make him feel better...or worse.

his heart felt like it had been shattered, and no amount of condolences from his friends and family would make me feel any less broken-hearted than he did.

he slumped, and he knew it. the day andy was ripped away from him, his body started to shut down, his mind killing him from the inside as thoughts whirlwinded inside. nothing making sense just like his feelings

he spent the next year acting almost robotically, doing the bare miniumum in order to survive. eat. drink. sleep. never leaving his room unless it was to get food, barely communicating with the friends around him. simply because everything remided him of the blonde boy who had brought so much joy into his life, and had been ripped away withought second thought and he couldn't help but wonder if it was a sick and twisted joke. that the universe hated him so much that it couldn't allow him to be happy.

instead of talking about his feelings he shut himself away. locking himself up and afraid to let anyone get close to him out of fear they would leave him too.

a sob rippled through his chest as he looked over to his favourite photo of himself and Andy. Andy had his arm casually slung around Jacks shoulders, jack resting his head ontop of Andy's fluffy hair. it had been taken the day he had gotten into the band. he was so happy. it was the day Andy had first kissed him and admitted that he like Jack. it was his favourite photo to date.

he sighed, laying back down on his bed and staring up at the ceiling. he felt tears leak out the corners of his eyes and steadlily down his face as he tried to will his mind back into numbness