Phoenix ( A Miraculous Fanfiction)

Chapter 19: This is Not Goodbye

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'Phixx slumped down on my shoulder and I chuckle. "You must be tired, huh?" I asked. Phixx just nodded sleepily. Gently, I carried her into my satchel and then I went home.

I was tired too, but I doubt I'll get any sleep tonight.'
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I barely slept a wink, as expected. I woke up in the middle of the night, screaming for Nathanael to not go into the building. Then, I kept having nightmares about him. I woke up again, but it was already 9 in the morning. It was a Saturday morning, so I had nothing to do anyway. I thought of Nathanael in the hospital. I'm planning to visit him, so I waited until visiting hours.

  I set out, and then suddenly I remembered about the kiss.  "Right...he probably doesn't want to see me," I said to myself. But I have to see him. Suddenly, I accidentally dropped my keys and when I reached out to get it, I saw my satchel. I remembered about Phixx. And just like that, I had a plan forming in my mind. 

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I went to the hospital, but I didn't go to his room. I asked where his room was at the counter and the nurse kindly gave me his room number. I thanked the nurse and went to the toilet at the same floor as Nathanael's room. I stayed there for some time, and then left. I passed the counter again and thanked the nurse again. Yes, it was my tactic to pretend I was visiting someone when I was just visiting a thing ; the toilet.

  Why am I doing this? Well, this is why.

I'm gonna visit him as Blaze. And of course I'm not gonna visit him during visiting hours, it would be autographings and interviews hour. But in the night. In the middle of the night.

I'm brilliant, am I right?

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"Blazing fire, rise!"

Phixx was totally against me for using my powers for my own needs, but she gave in when I persuaded her ( I even promised to give her two times more graham crackers). I jumped from roof to roof and went closer to the hospital. I climbed window to window ( I must look like a maniac, but thank god no one's looking ) and finally reached his room. I peeked from a small space between the curtains and saw Nathanael, he was still up. Slowly, I knocked at the window. I saw him immediately turning his head to my direction. I knocked harder and he got up. He moved the curtains away and..

our eyes met.

He was about to scream when I signaled him to shut his mouth. He nodded. Then I signaled him to open the window. He opened it and the first question he asked as soon as I got in was, "Blaze, is that really you?". I rolled my eyes, "No, I'm an imposter. I came here to strangle you to death."   "Really?!" he exclaimed. " Slow down will ya? Geez. I was only joking. Yes I'm Blaze," I said. "They said you saved me," he said in a much slower tone while getting back on his bed. "Yes, yes I did," I replied. "Thank you." he said. I just smiled.

"Are you okay now?"

"Better than yesterday. I got some bad burns, so I'll have to stay a little while at the hospital."

"Oh. "

"Why'd you come visit me?"

"What? Is it wrong?"

"No, it's just...well...too sudden."

I chuckled. He did too.

"It was really brave of you to save that little boy"

"Hey, it was nothing compared to you. You fight villains everyday"

I could feel my cheeks flush. "Well, it's my job. With great powers, comes great responsibilities they say. But you could have gotten killed in all that fire and smoke."

" I wish. I feel worthless that day anyway."

"Why?"

He looked at me. Then he sighed. "I just made a fool of myself"

He was talking about the kiss.  He really is. 'God, I must have hurt him bad' I thought.  He looked at me. Tears started to form in his eyes and before I could do anything , the tears fell down to his cheeks like a waterfall. He curled up on his bed, and I could hear his sobs.

"Hey, hey don't cry. Everything will be alright," I said.

  "No, it won't , Blaze. She'll hate me. I'm such a fool, I hate myself so much. In fact, if I was her, I wouldn't want to see me anymore and find another friend who is not as freaky as I am," he choked out, still in tears. 'But I'm seeing you right now. And I don't hate you'  I thought. I wish I could tell him that, but since I'm Blaze, I can't.  I went up to his bedside and gently patted on his shoulder.

He got up into a sitting position, and he faced me again. His eyes were red and so was his nose.

Then he hugged me.

For the first time, I felt like Cherice when I'm Blaze. I smiled and let him cry on my shoulder. "There, there, just cry it all out. I'm here," I said. I know I need to be there for him, for he had always been there for me.  We need each other.

  "Blaze?" I heard him whisper. "I know you don't know what happened that led me to this, but I just....for now I want you to promise something." "And what's that?" I asked. He broke the hug and looked at me with his red eyes. "There's this girl name Cherice Revere, in College Francoise Dupont. She's in my year and she sits right next to me," he hiccuped " I don't know if she'll come and visit me, but could you promise me that if you'd do anything you can to stop her from visiting me?".  I gave him a confused look. "But why-" " Because I don't know if I can face her. Really, I don't. If she comes then...I don't know." Tears started to fall again, but he quickly wiped it.

"I'm sorry that you have to see me like this."

"No. It's fine. And...I don't know if I can promise you that really..."

"Then promise me that you'll try. Try your best to keep her away from visiting me, if she ever thinks of doing that... which I doubt"

I sighed. Now I can't see him as Cherice anymore. But wait, I'm Blaze, but I'm Cherice as well! I could still see him, as long as he doesn't know my identity.

"Okay, I promise."

"Thank you, Blaze. Thank you so much. For saving me. For comforting me. For everything," he said. I gave him a weak smile. "You should really get going, it's late," he said. "I know. I guess I have to leave now," I said, giving him another weak smile. "Goodbye, Nath." "Wait, how do you know my name?" he asked. I felt my cheeks burning and then I said, "Well, from your friends of course. How else? I heard your friends calling you that. Is it okay if I call you Nath?". "Oh. Yeah, it's okay," he said.

  Just as I was about to leave his bedside, he grabbed my hand. I looked at him, giving him a questioning look. "Will you come...again?" he asked. "Of course I will. This is definitely not goodbye," I smiled. He sighed and released my hand. "Alright then..goodnight Blaze," he said. "Goodnight, Nath"

This is not goodbye. Definitely not goodbye.

-end of chapter 19-