Blown Apart

17

Dr Lexie Grey POV

I left the room feeling Bronte's unease about being left alone. If she didn't want to be alone why would she let her parents leave. And her staying with me who is practically a stranger makes little to no sense. I guess she will explain it later. Or not.
"We have already talked about this, Dr Grey." Dr Robbins says to me as I leave the room I keep walking down to get dressed I know if u don't get back in time Bronte will panic.
"She asked me to stay with her while her parents left. She doesn't want to be alone. And if you were her I guess you wouldn't want to be either. I'm just doing what she asks. And anyway isn't it good we have someone with her at all times. She needs to be looked at by a doctor we both know that her vitals weren't great and she shouldn't be in that much pain still. It's a good idea I'm with her."
"You know if you get to attached I'm going to have to take you off the case. I can't let your feelings get in the way." Dr Robbins stopped me from walking. "You have to think with a straight head, you need to give her the best care you can. You know she isn't in a good condition. Don't get caught up what you think is best and what you know."
"Okay I won't. But right now I need to go to her. And get her food cause we all know she hasn't eaten and she needs too."

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Bronte POV

It had been 17 minutes close to 18 and she wasn't back yet. What if something happened to her while she is gone? What if something is gonna happen to me? I wish the machine would stop beeping. I tried to focus on the tv to begin with but I couldn't focus on what happening nor find anything to watch. What happens in the test tomorrow there gonna do? What is it gonna show? Clearly it's that bad and I'm getting worse. What if I go to sleep and don't wake up. I mean would be so bad in that. My career is over I will never be a runner now. How can I run when I can't even walk. And it's not like I'm smart enough to do anything else. I barely keep my grades steady enough to stay on the team. And now my brain is even more damaged that I'm probably can't even do that.

I can feel my breathing start to pick up as I'm panicking it's past 20 minutes by about 2. I raise my hands to my chest and the other to my head. I can't breathe. And further remembering the situation I'm in by feeling my hairless head. My stomach hurts more than normal. As the beeping increases and speeds up. It feels like I'm drowning and I can't breathe.

Suddenly the door opens and Dr Grey walked through. She puts down the tray in the sofa and walks over to me.
"It's okay! I'm here! Breathe!" Dr Grey hugged me and sat on the edge of the bed and I leaned in. She held me so tired it felt like she was holding me from crumbling. I could hear her talking me through breathing exercises. But feeling her heart beat against me I could copy her breathe. And eventually I calmed down.

"See your okay." She said shushing me and stroking my back. I suddenly feel out of energy and tired. I don't want to sleep I know that for a fact. But I feel safe with her hugging me but also like an idiot for breaking down when she was five minutes late.

Dr Grey held me for the next five minutes. Until she was certain I was fine and she slightly pulled away but didn't let go.

"Fancy something to eat now?" I shrugged in response to her statement. I didn't want to do anything. I just wanted her to stay with me, I don't know why it's not like I've known her for long in theory just today, but I'm suddenly freaking out when she isn't here. She gets up and gets the trays of food and moves the table so it closer over my bed and pulls the chair so she is sat next to the bed not on it with me anymore.

I picked and poked at the food not feeling as if she could eat anything. I could sense Dr Grey staring at me not eating. And I could feel my eye lids very heavy.
"You should try eating something." Dr Grey said in between eating her sandwich.
"I'm...allergic?" I didn't mean it to sound so much like a question more of a statement but she definitely messed that up. My slow blinking was also really getting on my nerves and i couldn't comprehend everything that was going through my head it was almost like everything and nothing at the same time.

"You know I'm you doctor right? So I have read your medical records." Dr Grey said with a small laugh. It was stupid to think she wouldn't know i just felt bad she had gone through all this trouble to get me food and now i don't think i could stomach any of it.

"I'm really not hungry." I said shaking my head hoping the truth would be enough to drop the subject.

"Not even one bite." I shake my head in response and she leaves it for now. It feels so long since I've eaten anything it's like my body has forgotten what to do. She nodded and continue eat. The silence filled the room. But not the kinda where i was on my own. It was okay I didn't feel like it was awkward even though i was practically sat with a stranger.

Dr Grey finished eating and cleaned the stuff up and put away after offering me food again. She pulled a pack of cards out of her pocket and set up a game of go fish. She had explained the rules to me again as the game sounded familiar but couldn't remember ever playing it. My eye lids still hadn't worked out i didn't want to sleep and needed them to stay open. Also made it very difficult to focus on the cards in front of me. Half way through the game I could see Dr Grey flicking her eyes between her and me more often.

"What? Just ask." I said finally not stopping the game getting annoyed by the obvious question she was thinking.

"I think it's best you try to go to sleep. I can see your fighting it."  She said putting down her cards.

"No, I have slept for like a week. I'm fine I don't want to." I responded harshly i couldn't do it. 

"Tiger, I know you want to fight it but it's already late and you have a long day tomorrow. And i will stay in here. I won't leave you again i promise." I contemplated the offer. But it didn't stop me from being scared out of my mind.

"Would you maybe lie with me for a bit." Dr Grey gave me the sad smile which i should probably get to by everyone cause I doubt this will be the last time but she nodded and packed up the cards and told me to nudge over and i did. I immediately leaned over onto her as she wrapped her arm around me.

"Dr Grey..." I mumbled and looked up at her and was met with her eyes. " I'm scared." She squeezed me tightly before replying.

"I know, but your gonna get out of this and you are gonna be okay. And you can go back home and back to normal." She said and immediately i knew she was wrong, nothing is going to go back to normal or how it used to be. Everything is different and will always be.

"Don't tell anyone, that I'm scared." I mumble with silent tears leaving my eyes.

"It can be our little secret." She says as I finally give in and fall asleep.