Blown Apart

18

Chloe's POV

I can't be too angry at Beca. I know she is upset about Bronte and it is all an awful lot but she has to learn to control her temper around Bronte, especially as she is so fragile at the moment. Everyone is so fragile at the moment, clearly. I walk around the corner to Cece's room to see all the kids in there. They all set up a monopoly around Cece's bed, acting fakely happy, all trying to see more pleased then they are. Beca trying way too hard and the other kids trying to please her. I crack open the door slightly and I see Cece shoot me looks of pleading for the game to end. I could tell she was tired but they also all knew Beca was upset and didn't want to say no to them.

"Beca a word." I say as she looks back at the game.

"Sure but the kids and I are playing a game and I wouldn't want to miss my turn." Beca said trying to make the kids look enthusiastic but to no prevail.

"I kinda wanna stop for tonight. I'm tired." Brynlee says, putting her money and cards into one pile well attempting but again getting frustrated like everyone else in the family but Cece learned over and helped also putting hers in the pile.

"Fine, I've suddenly become free." Beca said, putting down her cards. She was acting like a teenager and I already had enough of them. I rolled my eyes and waited outside.

"Chloe as much as I love talking to you our kids are sick and we should be with them." she says turning back to go in.

"Beca stop acting like we are back in college. Grow up were adults. You have emotions I get it but don't take them out on me now because I saw you with them. It's not like i haven't seen you break down before." I say getting angry.

"Okay, I'm sorry. It's just a lot." Beca says running her fingers through her hair she was holding back again but i wasn't gonna push.

"This does put me on to my next statement. You need to stop freaking out around Bronte. She is barely holding it together and you snapping at her isn't going to help anyone not her. You need to control it and spend time with her while..." I stop not wanting to finish it. I didn't want to believe it but it's always at the back of my mind.

"While she is still here you were gonna say. I thought you were the positive one. Stop thinking like that she is alive."

"Beca that's not what I meant. Just that it's hard and she needs us. And..."

"Chloe stop. I get it. It's fine. Just don't bring it up again. We are both just tired. It's been a long week, we need some sleep. But why aren't you with her now?" Beca said flicking to get angry quickly.

"She had the doctors in and wanted me to go see you and get some sleep."

"And you just left after having a go at me for leaving her when at least I left her with you. You fully put her back on her own. After you just hinted at what you did. You're such a hypocrite." I was taken aback by the sudden outburst and her flicking it on me. I get we are both tired but snapping at me for no reason was uncalled for.

"Wow real mature turning this on me. She asked me to go, she cared about you enough and what was I gonna do so no."

"Yes Chloe you're her parent, just tell her you needed to stay with her, having someone there like we all did with Cece. Why is she any different? Just tell her fricking no."

"And upset her and set her off. Yea good plan. I was gonna give her time to comprehend everything she has been told today imagine if that was you. Wouldn't you need time alone!"

"I would also need someone there cause I wouldn't want to be left alone and ditch by my own parents!"

"Says you who had a go at her and stormed out before she even asked you to even leave!" I yelled and there was a knock on the window and we looked to the room. Cody was standing by the door and Brynlee was next to the window looking out. We both looked down and then back at our kids.

"We were just talking. We are tired, it's been a long week and i reckon we should all get some sleep." I say walking back into the room as Cody goes and joins Brynlee on the sofa and everyone shares this awkward silence. That seems to keep occuring.

"I reckon I should take the two fo them home and you stay in the hospital with Cece, as you don't want to be with the fourth." Beca mumbled the last statement and everyone looked up. I can see the bags underneath everyone's eyes and knew it was for the best.

"Sure." No one was going to question anything, that was just said and decided it was best to remain in the awkwardness.

I hug the kids goodnight and kiss them, and tell them to bring me a change of clothes. I passed over a bag of clothes. They all hugged and kissed Cece. Beca looked at me and walked out, I scoffed and looked away at her not even being able to kiss me.

"What were you guys arguing about?" Cece asked quietly. She was always the one to ask the bold questions.

"We weren't arguing just a slight disagreement."

"A loud slight disagreement." Cece mumbled.

"We are all just tired so we are getting snappy." I say trying to leave it as it is knowing that Cece isn't going to stop unless I put an end to it.

"What were you getting snappy about?"

"Oi cheeky stop with the questions now. We need some sleep." She nods and curls over to the side and I go over the sofa and collapse onto it. It's been a long day and it was nice to sit down and breathe. Finally my baby is awake. But I can't help but think I should be in there with her right now, that Beca was right.

"Mama, can we see Bronte tomorrow?" Cece spoke quietly, probably seeing if I was still up.

"Yea that's the plan she has to do a few more tests but after that it should be alright to go and see her." I say looking at her.

"She's bad isn't she. You guys wouldn't be as stressed if she wasn't." She says and I see tears in her eyes. She moved over on her bed giving me the hint that she wants me in the bed with her.

"She isn't doing great. It's quite overwhelming as you haven't seen her at all since everything has happened. And there is still a lot she has to go through surgery wise. But hopeful soon she will be fine."

"I want to go home." Cece says and starts crying. It breaks my heart. I haven't seen any of the kids cry since being at the hospital. Only Cody when it happened. I haven't even thought about how much they had been keeping in.

"I know you do Monkey. We will be home soon and things will be back to norm..." I stop myself cause for the first time I realise it won't. It's not gonna be normal again. I wish I'd known that that would have been the last moments. I wish I could go back and go for that run with Bronte, for the last time. I feel a tear roll down my face as I've realized I have started to let my brain wander.

"I love you. It's all gonna be alright. It might not be okay yet. But it will be." I hold onto her for dear life and let her fall asleep in my arms for the first time in years. And quietly continue to wipe the tears away from my eyes. Why did it happen to all of my children? I question before slowly also falling asleep, not loosening my grip on Cece.