Tear In My Heart

Chapter Fourteen

Warnings: Minor angst, but otherwise complete and total fluff

Word Count: 2637

Authors' Note: We hope you enjoy this chapter! :)

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August 2017 - The Hiatus

You knew this was your fault. You had said the kiss was a bad idea. You had avoided bringing up the topic since it happened. And you were the reason that your relationship with Josh hadn't gone past best friend slash roommate slash boss for the last month.

You grabbed your phone from where it was sitting next to you on the bed and decided to see what Josh was up to. He had been spending most of his days working, meaning that more often than not you were left to your own devices for entertainment. Given the current situation between the two of you, this was both a blessing and a curse.

"Hey, mind if I join you?" you asked as you wandered into the living room. Josh was on his laptop, as per usual, with the TV running in the background. He grabbed the remote and turned the volume down a little before gesturing to the empty space next to him.

"How are you doing?" he asked. His eyebrows furrowed as he looked at the screen.

"I'm doing ok. How's your work going?"

He rolled his eyes, "Tyler wants help figuring out a color scheme for this next era. We have the yellow, obviously, but he can't decide what he wants to put with it. Look at this."

Josh turned his laptop screen towards you, revealing a mosaic of different shades. Your eyes hurt just looking at it for a few seconds.

"Looks like exciting work."

"Yeah, right," he scoffed. "Actually, now that you're here, I think I might take a break from all of this before I get a headache."

"That's probably not a bad idea."

Josh reached over and grabbed his water bottle from the side table and took a long drink. You watched as he did so, trying your hardest not to just shamelessly stare at his lips. It didn't take long for you to start thinking about when they were just centimeters from yours, close enough to feel his breath on your...

"Y/N/N?"

"Huh?"

"Are you ok? You're staring at the ground pretty intensely."

"Yeah, sorry, I was just zoning out."

You wanted to bring up the almost kiss again, but just like every other time you had tried to, your mind went blank and you had no idea where to even start. Part of you was hoping one of these days, Josh would just up and kiss you, but you knew that was unlikely. As long as he thought you still needed time, he was going to wait until you gave him the ok to make a move.

Was it possible for someone to be too nice?

"Hey, do you remember the night of the Grammys?"

You weren't entirely sure where the thought came from or why you had decided to vocalize it, but it was out in the open now. A confused expression crossed Josh's face for a moment before it returned to normal.

"Barely. I was pretty plastered."

"So you don't remember me spending the night?"

Josh turned to you, confusion now evidently written all over his face.

"You spent the night?"

You began to pick at your jeans, realizing how weird this must all sound out of context. It had always been your assumption that Josh was too embarrassed to talk about what happened that night, especially after he heard about the fight with Beau. That was the reason you had always avoided bringing it up, anyway.