My Secret Heart

Chapter 30

We got to the hospital and Liam asked from Louis room number. We were told no one was allowed in to visit until everything was under control and figured out.

We all sat down in the waiting room waiting, not knowing what was going on or how he was doing.

I decided I had time to spare so I called Kelsey. I told her all what has gone on lately and how we all are in the hospital with Louis, now. She came over to comfort us and convince me everything would turn out alright, but I knew it wouldn't.

This was all because of me, it was all my fault. To think my best friend tried to kill himself because of me just made me cringe inside. To think he just might not be live, made my eyes fill with tears and my heart break.

We sat waiting for around five hours till finally a nurse came out. "For Tomlinson?" we all stood up anxiously and ran over to her.

"How is he?" Harry asked quickly. She just looked at us with a face that I had no idea if it was bad or good news.

She took a deep breath and started explaining. "Well the knife cut some flesh, tissues, all of what would happen when a knife contacts you. He would probably be fine if it was only just those things that happened. We could easily stich him up and make him as good as new. But he lost a ton of blood, once you lose too much blood there is a low risk of surviving. On top of that the knife went too deep, damaging a few organs. We tried our best to fix most of the problems but there was just too much damaged done for anything to work. I'm sorry but he won't end up making it through this."

I felt my heart break. My best friend was going to die. Tears flowed down my cheeks as all the other boys went into shock.

The nurse told us that we were able to go visit him individually, sense he wouldn't be here much longer. The boys all agreed I should be the first to go and see him, so the nurse led me to his room shutting the door behind me.

He laid on the hospital bed, eyes closed looking so peaceful. I didn't want to wake him so I just sat down in the chair sitting next to his bed. Right when I sat down his eyes slowly flickered open.

"Louis" I whispered as my heart began to beat fast.

He turned his head groggily looking at me then shuts his eyes once again, falling asleep faintly.

I just sat there watching him. His chest moving slowly as he breathed. I took his hand in mine as I just thought to myself, about everything.

"I'm sorry" I whispered as I kissed his hand. "I'm sorry you are here. I'm sorry this is happening. This is all because of me. If I just would have picked you, if I just would have made a different choice. Louis I'm sorry" I said as I started to cry. I looked down at our hands; this was the last time I would ever hold hands with him. This is the last time I would see my best friend. The last memory I would have with him.

"We have shared too many memories, and I can't believe they are going to end now, here, just like this." I quickly wiped my eyes and grasped onto his hand tightly. He opened his eyes coughing faintly. "Louis I love you. Please do me a favor, never forget me. You're a part of me and you will always be in my heart forever and always. I promise I will never forget you, ever... I have a secret heart." I paused as I watched his weary eyes watch mine. "A secret heart for you." My tears just kept coming; I had no control of them. I was losing my best friend, part of my life. And part of it was all my fault.

"Maggie." He finally spoke his eyes droopy as he breathed hard. "I will never forget you, you were and always are in my heart." He paused as he closed his eyes again, "Please will you do me one favor?"

"Yes Louis anything, anything!" I said as tears dropped onto our hands.

"Always stay with Niall, treat him well. He really loves you. I trust him not to break my baby. He may fail at times but he will never do so on purpose." He opened his eyes again to look at my tear stained face. "Please for me, don't do anything ludacris. Stay strong and stay the girl I always knew and loved."

"I promise Louis. I love you." I told him.

"I love you more Ducky." My heart shattered. This was the last time I would ever hear him call me that. This was the last time I was going to be able to talk to him. I started sobbing into his chest. "Shh please don't cry everything is going to be ok." He told me trying to comfort me. Nothing was going to be ok, nothing. Everything I had was leaving me. I would never be able to live with myself again.

"I'm sorry Lou. I'm sorry." I spoke gently as I lifted my head to look at him. I leaned in and planted a kiss on his lips. "I love you" I whispered. "I love you more" he said bring my lips back to his. I looked into those pale blue eyes, the ones I loved oh so much, the ones that always made me smile when nothing else could.

I looked into them for the last time, as he shut his eyes and the heart monitor went blank. "Forever and always, Louis. You are always here." I whispered as I placed my hand over my heart. A few tears fell down my checks as I stood up and took his hand in mine and pecked his cheek. "Forever and always."