I Can't Make You Stay [Kellic]

Chapter 7

Kellins POV

My stomach churned and I shot straight up in my bed, immediately releasing the contents in my stomach.

My head spun and I felt dizzy as I continued to vomit.

There was a rapid knocking on the door before my mom burst in.

"Kellin? Kellin, sweetie are you ok?" She questioned as she ran over to me.

Yes mom, I'm puking my guts out, but I'm totally fine.

I went to reply, but as I opened my mouth the only thing that came out was more contents.

She pushed my long hair back from my face, I could tell that she really didn't know what else to do. Hell I didn't know what to do. I couldn't even lift my head without more vomit spilling from my mouth.

She ran out of the room quickly, and I guessed it was to be sick herself. I would imagine this whole scene was just disgusting, but my thoughts were wrong and she returned as quick as she left.

She ran over and handed me a bucket. Well actually, it was an empty ice-cream container, but the same thing I guess.

I continued to puke into the bucket and part of me wondered how I still had anything left in me, but the bigger question floating around my head was why.

Why did I wake up?

I didn't fucking want to.

I took an entire bottle of pain killers for Christs sake!!

An entire fucking bottle.

I didn't understand. I didn't understand how I could possibly wake up after that, but some how I did.

No, I didn't take it as a "sign that I am meant to live". I took it as a sign that I'm so fucking pathetic that I can't even manage to kill myself.

This would mark my second failed attempt, though the first time I had managed to talk myself out of it, I still considered it a failure.

The vomiting finally ceased after about 30 minutes, but my head still felt like all the pressure in the world was compacted right on top if it, and I was weak and shaking uncontrollably.

"It must be flu," my mom said softly. Maybe even a little sad.

I just nodded.

She walked over and grabbed the bucket, which was now basically filled, and set it on the ground as she pulled back my comforter, which was also coated with contents of my stomach and then some.

I just sat there and watched her as she carried the blanket and the bucket out the door.

I was frozen in place for a good ten minutes before she came back upstairs. She entered my room with another bucket and set it by my bed, and then laid a clean comforter in front of me.

Still I sat there crossed legged watching every movement she made. She looked at me with comforting eyes.

"I called the school to tell them to excuse you." She said softly.

I just nodded my head slightly.

Oh god she knows. She knows what happened last night.

"Kellin..." She sounded as upset as she looked. "I know high school is hard, and I know the kids can be mean, but if you ever have a problem I want you to know you can tell me, or your father, or any of the teachers at school. . . I'm sure they can help.." She trailed off.

And then I remembered the bruises.

She thinks that I got beat up, well I did, but she doesn't know what else happened last night.