R E J E C T S

CH.45: I MISS YOU

It's been a week since Luke left my apartment...

Not that I was expecting a call from him or anything but he never did try to contact me since then.

It's either he's holding up real good or he hates my guts big time.

I mean, I can't blame the guy for hating me. I, myself hate me and I admit that what I did was very harsh.

My conscience has been eating me up the whole week which I never even knew existed until now.

Just then, someone knocks on my door. It was Luke's friends.

"I'm a bad person, I know." I said once I opened the door.

"Tell me about it!" Michael rolls his eyes as the three of them entered my crib.

"Luke wouldn't even go to school... did you two have that bad of a break up?" Ashton asked.

"You can't call it a break up when we weren't actually together in the first place." I stated the facts.

"Sure but it still seems like a rough break up to me." Calum says.

"We already tried EVERYTHING to cheer the guy up. We tried setting him up on blind dates, banding together, and cooking him his favorite food but nothing works!" Ashton sank down into my sofa.

"Clearly, all he wants is you..." Michael added.

"I'm pretty sure he hates me right now." I said.

"That is SO not the case. You should go visit him to check out for yourself." Calum suggested.

"I don't know where he lives."

"We'll show you." Ashton smiled, revealing his dimples.

"What are you trying to do here? We can't just make up like that. It's not that easy." I crossed my arms.

"Or is it? C'mon, Cher. We know you miss him..." Michael persuaded.

"Your words not mine."

"Woman, you're so stubborn! It's too late to say no though." Ashton shrugged.

"What---"

"Boys, put her in the trunk."

******

"This is kidnapping." I stated.

"Don't worry, you're no kid." Michael spoke slowly for me to understand then patted my head.

"We're here!" Ashton sang.

"Don't take this the wrong way, Cher. We're just here to help you make amends with him. At least be his friend." Calum adviced.

"I'll have to think about it." I said.

"Like Ashton said, too late for that now." Michael pushed me out of the car, dragged me to Luke's front door and rang the doorbell for me before he ran back to the car.

"Wimps." I stared off at their direction.

When the door opened, I was at a loss for words when I saw Luke.

"You look... different." I managed to say.

It has only been a week since we last saw each other but somehow he looked older and more mature yet still very good-looking.

"Can I help you?" He asked.

Even his voice sounds different.

"You took your lip piercing off." My eyes fixated on his lips.

And he grew some beard.

I glanced back at the guys who were transparently hiding inside the car with a look of uncertainty and confusion.

Then I saw Ashton face-palming himself for some reason.

"Luke, I'm sorry about---"

"Oh, I'm not Luke. I'm his older brother, Jack but I do want to know what you're sorry about." He grinned.

"..." This is embarrassing.

"He never told me he had a brother..." Who looks just like an older version of him.

He looks just about my age too.

"Bro, who is it?" Another blondie came at the door.

"There's a pretty girl looking for our little bro." Jack smiled.

"Oooh!" The other blonde teased.

"I'm Ben by the way, Luke's other older brother." He introduced himself.

"Luke never mentioned you either." I thought out loud.

"That punk!" Ben says. He looks alright too.

Come to think of it, Luke never mentioned any of his family members for I never really mentioned mine either.

His family's got some good genes though for they're all good-looking blondes.

"I can come back some other time..." I began but then Ben pulled me inside the house without a warning.

"Luke's room is on the second floor, the last door by the end of the hall." Jack informed me.

"You kids be good now." Ben patted my head.

As if Luke would welcome me with open arms.

******

I knocked on his door for about three minutes but then I found out that the door was unlocked so I went in anyway.

"Go away unless you're Cher!" Luke said under the covers.

"Okay." I continued standing there which made him take a peek right after hearing my voice.

"Shit. I'm not ready for this yet. I was only bluffing when I said that I wanted to see you." He choked.

"We need to talk." I stated.

"No we don't. I mean, at least let me shower and shave first before I face you."

"Want me to shave you?" I cracked a joke to lighten up the mood.

"Yes! I mean... let's not go there yet. I'm still mad at you, you know?" He finally got out of the covers.

"I know. I'm a REALLY horrible person which is why you don't deserve me. You deserve someone better."

"I'm not looking for someone 'better'... I'm looking for someone exactly like you." He said seriously.

"Sorry but I'm not here to come to you. I'm here to apologize and offer you my friendship but I totally understand if you don't want to be friends with me. Your choice." I sighed.

"Don't waste your time on me, you're already the voice inside my head." He replied.

"So is that a no or---"

"I'll be your friend if that's what it takes to be by your side again. That's how much I miss you." He stared intensely at me.

Deep down inside, I miss you too, Luke...

I just can't say it out loud for that's just who I am, too afraid of becoming too attached to someone else.