Watching a Silent Dawn

Park Benches and Winter Sunlight

After a morning of stolen glances and lightning touches, Eddie and Richie had left Clarissa to babysit the house while they set off on a walk to the nearest park. While December was almost over, the cold and unfriendly weather had retreated in return for a day of a bright, cloudy sky and brisk air that reminded the town eerily of the past October. Many people had the same idea as Richie and Eddie and had decided to take advantage of the fairly nice day out and take a stroll in the park. Especially mothers and their young children. While the two strode around looking for a somewhat secluded spot to sit, children of many ages ran through and around their legs as they walked by, as well as occasionally bumping into them. As this all happened many times, Eddie just smiled and laughed it off, but it gave Richie very extreme anxiety, although not showing it in his effort to not ruin his little outing with Eddie. But, as they kept walking and as the kids kept interrupting, he couldn't help but be reminded of when that happened. When she was still there. When everything was still okay and when he could still speak but then-but then- everything happened and he couldn't stop and-and-

"RICHIE!!"

Richie's eyes snapped open. He didn't even realize he'd shut them. Eddie stood in front of him with both of his hands clamped onto his shoulders and fear and worry were all that you could see in his eyes. "What-what's going on Rich? You were having an anxiety attack. Look at you, you're shaking and your fists are clenched." That's when Richie became hyper-aware of everything. His fists clenched so hard his fingernails were digging into his skin and his knuckles were white. His entire body shivering like he'd gone diving in the quarry in the middle of the night. His fast, uneven breathing, like he'd just finished a marathon. Somehow in the midst of Richie having an anxiety attack, Eddie had managed to pull them both away from view of everyone else at the park so unwarranted stares wouldn't be given by unforgiving strangers. Richie was thankful for that. He took a moment to physically relax. First his fists, then his breathing, then his entire body. His mind was far too gone in the past to completely relax. "Hey- come on, Rich. You know you can tell me anything. I don't think you brought your notebook with, but you can use my phone to talk." Eddie guided him to a secluded bench and sat so he could hopefully understand what made Richie react so badly. Richie didn't take the phone from Eddie's outstretched hand. Instead, he reached over and hugged Eddie, burying his face in the other's shoulder, and just broke down sobbing. This wasn't any cry, no. This was the sound of long repressed pain and heartbreak. Eddie almost started crying with him. Rather than join him, Eddie wrapped his arms tight around Richie and held him close. "Oh shit- yeah, there we go, that's it. Come on, Chee, just let it all out, yep, just like that." Eddie continued to soothe and console Richie as he cried his heart out on Eddie's shoulder because he couldn't keep it in anymore. He couldn't hide his pain, he couldn't forget what happened, he just couldn't anymore. So he let it all out. "Rich, I-I wanna help you, but I need to know what's wrong. Can you tell me what's wrong? Can you tell me please?" Eddie asked desperately. He hated to see Richie unhappy. He hated to see him cry and be heartbroken. He couldn't stand it. All he wanted to do was help. Slowly, Richie's crying came to a stop. He lifted his head from Eddie's shoulder and looked at him. His eyes were tinted pink and red, his cheeks even redder. Tears were streaming down his face like waterfalls and making marbled patterns across his face, his eyelashes stuck together like glue and glistened in the winter sunlight. He looked utterly broken. Before Eddie could say another word, Richie grabbed his phone and typed a single sentence. Clarissa isn't the only one.