Intersex (Mpreg) [COMPLETE]

Chapter 37.

The first seal I ever saw was laying dead by the shoreline, decomposing as birds picked at its fair skin and crabs ate away at its eyes. The swollen carcass looked as if it would explode any second. A mere poke or push and it would blow up, spraying its surroundings with blood, pus and fat. It doesn't take more than a few seconds to plunge into sadness and despair, not when your hormones are going haywire and your stomach looks like a bulging dead seal. Thankfully the only thing that happened when I poked my stomach was either a punch from Smith or absolute radio silence. He seemed to be in the right position now at least, face down, ass up, just like me when I had sex. Not even that made me feel any less down though and I just felt sad and empty in general.

It was March first when I started feeling really self-conscious about the belly. I was only two days into my 30th week and Jayden would graduate college in a bit more than two months. Kennedy would finish his second year and in a bit more than two months, there would be a baby in my life and a large cut over my stomach. After speaking to my doctor and some midwives, we had agreed that there was no way in hell I was giving birth naturally. Not only was it high risk but I would also probably fuck up my organs. My body was, after all, not really built to handle shoving out melon-sized babies. In ten weeks we would drive over to the university hospital and they would start my labour. How could they do that? I had no idea but I'm sure if they knocked gently on my stomach and asked Smith to come out, he'd gladly be on his way. The kid was pretty responsive after all.

With my room packed up in several boxes, all that remained unpacked was my bed and the furniture that was too large to stuff in a cardboard box. We still hadn't decided when exactly we were going to move into the new house but I wanted it to be relatively soon so I could get settled in and fix up Smith's room. He would be born a few weeks before their graduation, meaning that he would probably be able to attend it with me. He would only be a few weeks old and he would be sleeping or crying the entire time, sure, but I knew that Jayden wanted his son there to 'see' him graduate. He would be there to see his dad and uncle graduate college, then a few years later he'd be able to see Kennedy graduate and then me. I drew circles over my stomach where I laid on my bed. I would've wanted to graduate with Kennedy, to have classes with him in general, but I couldn't raise a kid in class, do homework and play with a baby at the same time, change diapers while I took my final exams. He was more important. If given him a good childhood meant scarifying a few years of my college experience, then do be it. I would start taking classes again when he was old enough for daycare.

"You're acting like the world is ending..." Brian mumbled in the doorway. It seemed our conversation always began with him standing in the doorway as if everything was going on repeat. "What's got you down?"

"I really don't wanna talk about it..." I sighed, turning to my side so that he couldn't look at my face.

"You haven't eaten all day... Do you want me to make you something?"

I shook my head. I wasn't hungry, just tired.

"I would pull you out of bed but I don't wanna hurt you or Smithy, so will you make this easy for me and get up by yourself?"

"I'm not getting up..."

"Don't be a baby..."

"Just... Fuck off, Brian..." I snapped, whimpering. Why did I feel as if I was approaching the end of a long road where I would have to choose a new path. I didn't like it, I wanted to have a normal routine.

"Oh wow..." he sighed. "Okay... scoot over, you need a hug..."

Not even Hannah could read me like Brian. The moment his body weighed down on the bed next to me, I broke out in tears. He pulled me up against his chest and put my head in the crook of his neck, stroking my hair back.