Pokémon: Revolutions

Is this the Water Type Gym?... No, THIS IS PATRICK!

Narrator: After catching pokemon that we'll probably never see again and reminding us why he is still a helpless virgin.

Ari: Wait, what the fuck was that?! Where is that voice coming from?!

Edward: Oh him, he is the narrator.

Ari: The who?!

Narrator: Our protagonist now finds himself with a new partner because, you now, pokegirl, and faces the predicament of winning the next gym badge while training probably the only person in this world who is even dumber than he is.

Ari: Hey!

Narrator: What other problems this pair of idiots will have to deal with? Will Edward finally win the Cascade Badge after all this chapters? Let's find out!

(Edward's POV)

Ari: Um... Ok, that was creepiest thing that I've ever seen.

She says still taken aback for what just happened.

Edward: Don't you mean... that you've ever heard? Uh? Uh?

I say in a joking tone while smiling and tugging at her.

Ari:...

Edward:...

...

Narrator: Idiot.

Ari:... Are you serious?

She says in a stern tone.

Edward: Oh come on! Give me some credit for trying!

Ari: Were you even trying?

She says in a mocking tone.

Edward: Were you even trying to win when we battled?

Ari: I-I!

Edward: Boom bitch! ON. YOUR. FACE!

Ari: You've never had a girlfriend before have you?

Edward: And you've never won a battle before have you?

Narrator: Fight! fight! fight! fight!

Edward/Ari: Shut up asshole!

Waiter: Um...

We both turned to the waiter only to see his befuddled expression at our recent outburst.

Waiter: Is everything ok?

He asks as we both calm down.

Edward: Yeah, everything is fine.

Ari: Better than ever.

We both say trying to hide our embarrassment as a light blush covers our cheeks.

Waiter: Right... your food is ready sir.

I look at him but find him holding anything.

Edward: And... Where is it?

Suddenly, a crowd of waiters came out of the cafe doors with trays full of food as I watch with horror the huge mountains of dishes. On the contrary, Ari watched them with sparkling eyes and her mouth fully open while a river of saliva flooded the floor, almost making some of the waiters stumble at its slippery. Then they put all the food in the table as I'm still too stunned to say anything as Ari's stomach roars with an incredible might.

Edward: Holly shit-!

Ari: Itadakimasu!!!

Is all she says before devouring everything that is in her way, like a god damn black hole. Wait, now that I think about it, how is it that I wasn't hungry before coming here, I mean, It's been literally days since I left home but I haven't eaten since then! How is it that I'm not dead yet?! Damn you plot holes and anime inconsistence!