conflict || jjk x Bts

chapter 12

A/n : it's quarantine y'all , corona is fucking everyone up so stay safe babes and I decided to update cause I feel so bad I kind off left y'all with a cliffhanger hh sorry not sorry but let's get into the chapter . enjoy :)

Jungkook POV:
I feel like I'm drowning in a pit of darkness , deep into nothingness , my body feels super heavy , my breathing is shallow and ragged , I'm suffocating , my senses are leaving me  .

I tried turning my head in all the directions but it was useless, I felt trapped inside of my own body , there was no escape , my conscience was slowly awakening as numerous thoughts swarmed inside my head bugging me as I felt even more restless and uncomfortable .
there was a certain voice that stood out though ;

"you just freaking collapsed jungkook , you're such an attention seeker who just wants his hyung's sympathy and pity  , how pathetic ! " .

"Shut up ! " I tried to fight it, but it seemingly kept annoying me ;

"Jungkook , I'm just sharing this bitter truth with you don't try to deny it , you're such a weakling , and you know for sure that you're also being such a
burden , fainting in the middle of dance practice ! How irresponsible of you , you caused this to yourself , don't be a coward and admit it".

"Shut up ! " I repeated .

"I'm the voice of reason jungkook , I'm sure all of your hyungs are mad at you, they won't even feel slightly worried , I can assure you , and we both know that you deserve it ! You've caused so much damage to your bond with them and it can never be fixed , you're so worthless !"

This time I felt like I agreed with what the voice said as I gave up trying to block it's voice with feeble attempts , it was to no avail.

It never fails to scare me how self destructive I can be , but I can't help it it's in my nature , I just always over think every single thing , I'm way too observant , I always seem to focus on every detail , and it's honestly frustrating because it causes me so much damage , I can't help but hate myself for being this way , it's just too much to bare , I'm broken and I know very well that I can never be fixed , I'm a lost cause , I'm a nuisance  , and I'm sure the world would be a better place without me .

I've always thought of just ending it , but remembering that I have six brothers that care for me and probably love me , makes me feel selfish at the mere thought of it and I'm always quick to discard it , but this time , i have such a strong urge to fucking kill myself to just feel at peace and get rid of the heavy weight that i keep carrying on my shoulders .

I feel worthless, useless , sad ,  depressed, suicidal , and I always have the tendencies to think that way .
I can't believe that  I just passed out , and my mind still manages to function and remind me that I'm good for nothing , it's triggering honestly.

Third person pov :
To say that they weren't expecting it was an understanding , they  were shocked and terrified to say the least , as they gazed at jungkook's lifeless figure on the ground , no one seemed to have gotten out of their daze until namjoon hurriedly knelt next to their maknae , demanding jin to call 911 , the staff members and managers were all shaken up as they silently watched , all the members encircled their passed out youngest member with tear soaked faces and worried facial expressions as they guiltily blamed themselves for not noticing anything  and prayed for jungkook's safety .

It was as if time had stopped for them when a loud thudding noise echoed in the studio gathering everyone's attention and their hearts clenched at the sight before them , it felt like such a horrible nightmare .

It felt like hours waiting for the ambulance to arrive , until a group of paramedics rushed inside the room with a stretcher , settling jungkook on top of it and rushed back to the ambulance so  they could reach the destination of the hospital .

All the members got inside their van hurriedly , following the ambulance , as it's sirens kept blaring that sickening sound on repeat , alerting everyone of the emergency ,they felt paranoid as fear coursed through their bodies and numerous scenarios played inside their heads .

They were conscious that jungkook might only have fainted because of dehydration and constant overworking, but nothing seemed to prevent them from over thinking , it was nerve wracking and stressful , they always dreaded moments like these because it used to always happen to jimin .

Everyone seemed lost in a maze of thoughts while taehyung and jimin were trying to console and give company to each other.

When the car pulled on in front of the huge hospital , they all sucked in their breaths as they scattered out of the van and ran to the automatic doors of the entrance in panic , jungkook was nowhere to be seen and they concluded that he must have already been transferred to a chamber .

They stood in front of a middle aged women who was occupying the front desk as they waited for her to reveal jungkook's room number , and once they got the needed information they rushed to the said room .
Each one of them panting in exhaustion because they didn't use the elevator .

They then proceeded with sitting on the chairs in the long hallway filled with nurses ,doctors ,and patients and thank god no one noticed them thanks to the masks they wore .

Their foots tapped nervously on the floor waiting for a doctor to exit the room so he could inform them about jungkook's condition, they were worried sick for him and nothing could help them relax , not even each other's presence , they just needed to know that their baby brother was okay .

At the sound of a door clicking , they turned their heads in sync meeting eyes with a doctor who gazed at them with curious eyes , and asked :

" excuse me ? but are you guys perhaps jeon jungkook's family ?" .

jin hopped off his chair at the mention of their brother's name and answered with a short yes wanting to be given all the information without longer a do  , and in a speed of light all the other members stood by his side awaiting for the doctor's announcement .