Hope Lost: A Daryl Dixon Story (The Walking Dead/ Bethyl )

32- Sunshine, flowers and smiles

It was a bright and crisp morning when Beth found Daryl lounging outside the farm house, lost in his thoughts. She tilted her head as she watched his long hair blow around his face. She embraced him from behind and kissed the bare skin on his shoulder.

‘Morning,’ She whispered into his skin, as if her words were a secret.

In means of greeting, Daryl outstretched him arm and pulled Beth into him and lightly kissed her temple. It was short and sweet, but such little contact between them somehow brightened her morning further.

‘I’m heading into town today. For Judith. Maybe strike it rich with some baby food.’ He said.

‘Maybe,’

‘Is she awake yet?’ He asked.

‘No, sleepin’ soundly.’

A trace of a smile appeared on his face. ‘I’m gon’ take a piss.’ He announced and walked down the porch stairs. She watched his figure disappear and sighed to herself. Their newfound relationship, or whatever it was, made Beth reminiscent of her childhood thoughts and dreams for life ahead. When she was younger, she would sit on the very same porch and dream of what her life would be like. Sunshine, flowers and smiles all year round. She would stay on the farm for the rest of her life, marry a handsome local man and raise a family together. The word family hung in her thoughts as Daryl returned. He walked straight past her into the house and returned moments later with his crossbow and a supply bag. Beth looked at him as he approached her. He laid a single hand on her waist and barely touched her lips with his. He pulled back, gently stroked her cheek and turned to leave.

‘Be quick,’ She said to his back.

He didn’t reply, but kept on walking. He stiffened midway down the stairs, and slowly turned to face her.

‘Hey, Beth?’ he said in a soft, low voice.

‘Yeah?’

‘Would ya, I mean…Come with me today.’ He cleared his throat.

Beth smiled, ‘I’d love too.’

--

They went through every available store possible in the span of a short few hours. Daryl found a few pots of baby food, but they were off. They decided that to look further would be in vain, and they’d better just cut up whatever they eat real fine for the baby

‘I wasn’t raised on squirrel.’ Beth said jokingly.

‘I was.’ Daryl said under his breath. She gave him an inquiring look. Beth then realised that she didn’t know much about Daryl’s past and where he came from, how he was raised and the troubles he’d faced. But her look wasn’t sympathy for Daryl; it was care. And so he told her his story. He unloaded about how he gotten lost and had to spend a few days in the woods, and when he returned home his father hadn’t even noticed he was gone. He spoke about his alcoholic parents and his strained relationship with Merle when they were teenagers. He even shared some of his darkest secrets, things that would put even the toughest most sinister criminals to shame. And Beth listened. As each word was spoken, her heart somehow opened even more. He was broken, she knew that. And her heart warmed when she realised that Daryl Dixon was healing. In the back of her mind, she knew she had her fair share amount of issues. But that was fine, because Beth Greene and Daryl Dixon were healing together.

--

Daryl Dixon found himself under the tree again. This time though, he was on the ground on his back, at peace. Things were okay. He didn’t mind that he was a little bit hungrier every night, as long as Judith was fed and healthy. He didn’t mind that camp numbers were dwindling.  There was just one thing still bothering him. Rick.

Would he ever see his brother again?

The way things were at the moment, the amount of time that had passed since the downfall of the prison, Daryl felt the answer was clear. But that didn’t mean he was alone. He had a family. A shadow of a smirk appeared across his face upon that thought. When it all started, Daryl would have given anything for independence. He yearned for freedom. If Daryl has experienced one thing, it’s that things change. Even the hardest rocks can be smoothed over time.

Daryl’s lonely tree swayed in the gentle breeze. He heard the soft thuds of boots approaching. Beth sat cross legged next to his stretched out figure.

‘It’s so quiet out here.’ She said.

Daryl grunted softly. Beth closed her eyes and breathed in.

‘My daddy once told me, ‘If you don’t have hope, then what’s the point of living?’. It was when we first arrived at the prison. I didn’t want to unpack, because I was so used to running away. And then he told me that.’

Daryl watched her out the corner of his eyes. Beth’s hair was loose for a change, and strands of it fluttered in the wind. Daryl chewed on his thumb nail and waited for her to continue.

‘He was wrong.’ Beth frowned. ‘Hope is great and everything, but it’s kind of an empty promise. What you really need is acceptance. Accepting that this is what it’s going to be like till we die. There’s no point in hoping for an end for it all, because it’s just not going to happen.’

‘This speech ain’t like you.’ Daryl muttered.

‘You’re right. But maybe I’m not that naïve girl anymore.’

It was quiet for a while. The sun was in full blaze, beating down on the two of them and the wind giving them a gentle reminder it was still there. Spots of blue and purple patched the field ahead. Beth remembered how as a little girl, she would become excited every year when the flowers started to bloom. This year, it didn’t even seem to matter. Daryl expectantly took her hand in his and brought it to rest on his chest.

‘Do ya remember, few days ago, you asked me to stay?’ He spoke softly.

Beth nodded.

‘And I said I will.’

Beth nodded again.

‘That wasn’t an empty promise.’

A ghost of a smile appeared on her face. Daryl was a good man. He made her happy. Even if the future was grim, if there even was a future ahead for them, the present moment was sweet. Even if her life didn’t turn out how she expected it to, she was okay.

And hell, being okay in this world said a lot.