Star Wars: Jedi Fallen Order | Cal Kestis x Reader

Part 1

You were splayed out across Greez's couch, lazily basking under the artificial lights fixed to the ceiling of the Mantis, the ship that you had made into your home not too long ago. Twirling a thin, metallic cylindrical object between your fingers, a lightsaber, you retreat into your mind. Spacing out completely as you stare off into the void-

"Are you listening to me Y/N?!" Cere exclaims as she quickly rushes past you into the cockpit after noticing you had snapped out of your daze. Following her with your eyes you quickly sit up, bewildered as to why she'd spoken to in such a harsh tone. Cere was not one to ever speak in such a manner, much less to you.

"What? What in the Maker's name happened?" You question, treading cautiously around the obviously agitated woman. You'd truly never seen her this way, except for when she first recruited you aboard the Mantis, uncharacteristically irritated at the fact that you weren't the answer to all her questions.

"She's found a Jedi on Bracca! Now hurry up off your butt and get in your chair, we're all hands on this time, kid." Greez quickly adds, hot on Cere's trail. The Latero genuinely panicked as he sat in his chair readying the ship to jump into Hyperspace.

Realizing the gravity of situation, you jump out of your current position, almost hitting your shoulder on the frame of the door to sit in the chair next to Greez. Yanking a communications headset over your head you set coordinates to the junkyard of planet known as Bracca and set off on your journey.

This wasn't any ordinary  mission, this could finally be your big break, maybe Cere would finally get off your back. You couldn't really fulfill the vision of you she had nor did you ever really care to. Restoring the Jedi Order wasn't really your scene, however your empathy for others betrayed you and you ended up making a false promise to Cere; that you'd be the one to restore the Jedi Order.

Sure you felt bad, who wouldn't? Leading on a woman blinded by her loyalty to a past era with false hopes that you'd be the messiah who would make all her hopes and dreams come true, wasn't exactly the Jedi or any morally correct way. You couldn't say no to Cere, not when she was practically at your knees begging you to at least try, to try for all the children whose lives didn't have to be taken away unjustly just as yours was. Guilt and pity clawing away at any resolve you might've had you stared into her round eyes, you sighed softly and gave into her desperate pleas. Deep down you have always had your suspicions that she knew your heart wasn't in it, maybe that's why she kept looking for another Jedi. Maybe she also took pity on you, maybe it was guilt eating her alive that she forced you into her selfish affairs. She knew what that meant to your life and how important self preservation was, especially after the Purge. Perhaps that also had a hand in why she kept you around. Either way, you made a promise to Cere that you would stick around and thats exactly what you're going to do. You needed her as much as she need you.

Jumping in Hyperspace was never really fun for you, you never got used to it. Lurching back into your seat you shot Greez a look, he gave an apologetic wince in return. Sighing you look back down at your monitors.

"We should be coming up on Bracca pretty soon here, so before we do just want you guys to know that you have all been a pain in my ass." You sarcastically state. Not even sparing your companions a glance as you address them.

"Yeah yeah, love you too, kid." Greez shakes his head as he huffs out his response. You always did have a strange way of showing those around you that you cared. Never really one for sappy moments or moments in general. The war and the purge had hardened your outlook on the universe, you lost the ability to freely express yourself and the ability to blindly trust those around you, something that has kept you very much alive and breathing. Yet you couldn't help but go against every instinct that screamed at you to walk away from the broken woman at your feet. You trusted Cere. Once again Cere's words derailed your train of  thought as she spoke.