It's like I lie in my bedroom walls
Staring and reminiscing about the times
Times where I didn't have to cry myself to sleep on the phone
Or wait until 6 AM after the paranoia passes.
I look at these walls, dirty and scratched from the 16+ years I've been here
Seeing the good memories
Reminded of the bad
Maybe this house is cursed
Maybe my life was cursed long ago in 2014 when I should have died
Or maybe back in 2016/2017 when I attempted 7 times on my life.
Ever since those days, I've never felt safe
Never felt a thing
No remorse
No care
No respect
Nothing
I've only felt anger and sadness filled with a burning cup of pain.
The walls watched as my innocent child mind turned into a violent, nihilistic adult one
One where I've hurt my father
Brothers
Family
Friends.
I don't wish to change who I've become
This manipulative and despicable piece of trash
I only wish to remove the memories in which this person resides.
YOU ARE READING
Dreams Over Reality
PoetryA compliation of poems and skits. The skits are no longer being continued. Most poems are about me and the events around me. Read my story This is my story.