SCENE SEVEN
(Caspers house. HYPNOS sits at the kitchen table. CASPER enters, carrying the shoebox. He looks good. He acts cold.)
HYPNOS: Where do you think youre going, private?
CASPER: The play?
HYPNOS: What play? Youre in a play? Did you borrow my car on Halloween?
ALEX: Disdainful denial.
CASPER: I dont know what youre talking about.
HYPNOS: Then I guess I should blame the car elves.
CASPER: Do whatever you want.
(CASPER starts to go.)
HYPNOS: Did you take it to that party?
ALEX: Wait.
(CASPER stops.)
HYPNOS: Im worried about you! You come and go at all hours, doing god knows what, wearing these new clothes Whats going on with you?
ALEX: Tell him the truth.
CASPER: I took a pill-sized computer called a Squip thats in my brain, and it talks to me, and its made everything better.
HYPNOS: If youre not going to take me seriously--
CASPER: Why should I?
HYPNOS: Excuse me?
CASPER: Im supposed to believe you care? Look in the mirror! Ever since Mom left, you sit around like youre waiting for her to come back! If she did, you know what shed find? A loser whos so afraid to have a life, he cant even put PANTS ON!
HYPNOS: I could ground you.
CASPER: I dont think you could. (Beat.) Good talk. (CASPER makes a show of taking the car keys.) Dont wait up.
(CASPER exits. HYPNOS sits for a beat. Making a decision.)
The Pants Song
HYPNOS: Casper
Is in big bad trouble right now
Its a trouble that
He cant see
So I gotta help him somehow
I dont know what he wants
But I know what he needs
Hell need a dad so strong
To help him not slip away
I havent been a dad for so long
But I think Im ready today
Situation is grave
Nows the time to be brave
Im gonna finally make that climb
One leg at a time
When you love somebody
You put your pants on for them
When you love somebody
You take a chance just for them,
Chance just for them
If the road gets muddy
Focus on the goal til the rough stuffs gone
When you love somebody you put your pants on
(Later. GABE on his porch, smoking a joint and burning mementos in the ash can.)
GABE: Magic the Gathering card he gave me for the birthday no one else remembered Burn it. Ticket stub from our first concert. (Reads the ticket.) Weird Al. (He throws it in the can.) Super burn it.
(HYPNOS approaches. He is wearing a pair of thermal underwear.)
HYPNOS: Gabe!
(GABE hides his joint)
GABE: Mr. Hypnos, what are you doing here?
HYPNOS: We need to talk about Casper.
GABE: Sorry, Casper and I arent friends anymore--
HYPNOS: Do you love him?
GABE: What?
HYPNOS: He can be a little shit sometimes. We both know that. But thats no excuse to sit around burning incense while he turns himself into a monster!
GABE: Yeahh, Im gonna--
(He starts heading inside. But HYPNOS blocks his way.)
HYPNOS: I need you
Cause I do not have the tools
To help with what hes going through
And I know you know all the rules
GABE: But Im not what he wants
HYPNOS: But youre just what he needs.
This might be hard I know
You just suck it up and go
When you love somebody
You put your pants on for them
When you love somebody
You take a stance just for them,
Stance just for them
If the fight gets bloody
Just keep pushing through til the pain is gone
When you love somebody you put your pants on.
GABE: Youre here because you need pants?
HYPNOS: Oh, no, I need you to reach out to him. Casper wont listen to me. And I cant blame him. But somebody has to watch his back.
GABE: If I try harder to be his friend you have to try harder to be his dad. Theres a Kohls down the street. I dont care what kind-- jeans, khaki, leather. Youre not leaving that store until you buy a pair.
(Beat. HYPNOS takes his hand.)
HYPNOS: You drive a hard bargain, son.
GABE: When you love somebody
You put your pants on for them
HYPNOS: Wear those pants
GABE: Somewhat reluctantly
Still you gotta go
Oh oh
BOTH: When you love somebody
You put your pants on for them
Metaphorically
HYPNOS: Or sometimes actual pants,
Real, literal pants
BOTH: Its a classic study
Of the things we do for our best friend
When you love somebody
GABE: You see it to the end
BOTH: When you love somebody
HYPNOS: The conclusions foregone
BOTH: When you love somebody
You put your big boy pants right on
You put your pants on
YOU ARE READING
"Be More Chill: The Musical" But with oc's
General FictionBE MORE CHILL Music & Lyrics by Joe Iconis Book by Joe Tracz Based on the novel by Ned Vizzini BE MORE CHILL Characters: JEREMY HEERE/CASPER COLLINS, awkward high school junior CHRISTINE CANIGULA/ SHAWN CLARK, high school theatre boy, sweetly...
