Quarantine [Tag Book]

04/20/20

420. Ha.

     I gazed out the window of my mom's new Tacoma, thinking about all the mistakes I've made in my life. I looked at my dad, and then I spoke. "What do guys expect when they flirt with girls?"

     "Guys talk crap, but we don't want to hear that from girls. You do that and they'll be gone." He tilted his head a bit as he headed down the freeway, meanwhile my brain was kicking itself.

     "Oh," I replied.

     "You do that, don't you," it was more of a statement than a question.

     I nodded, picking at a hangnail, "yeah," I replied, looking at the floor of the small pickup, "I try not too, but that's all I know."

     "Shoot a line out, like, what do you say?"

     I sat there in silence.

     For a whole ten minutes.

     "You don't know how to flirt, do you?" He asked, glancing at me in his rear view mirror. 

     Again, I shook my head, "I don't got no game," I tore the hangnail off, flinching as it came off my finger. Ow.

     My little brother's legs flailed and he put his hand on my shoulder, "yes you do, yes you do! You have Minecraft!!"

I thought that this was pretty hilarious, but that's just me. Haha.

     Later on down the road, I got thinking again, and so I spoke, "what about when you go on a date with a guy and he makes the girl pay?"

    My dad about lost it then, "...no guy that makes my daughter pay is going to marry her," he went on, after a long, long rant about how wrong it was, "why?"

     "So every guy I've been on a date with down here is out?"

     My mom laughed, "yeah," she nodded her head vigorously. 

     "How many dates have you paid for?" My dad looked glanced back at me. It took me a minute but I finally got the number down.

     I looked up from my fingers, "five," I replied.

     He shook his head, "what's wrong with our world today? Back in my day if a boy did that to a girl, the boy's dad would beat the crap out of him for it. Now that's what's basically expected. It's a bunch of bull crap."

      I got thinking again, and realized... I hadn't been on a date where the guy asked me on the date. The last three dates I've been on, I asked the guy. That's not good for my ego. 

     Today's kinda been a roller coaster, I realized that I cannot physically or emotionally get myself to flirt (yet) and the most flirting I got from a guy was when I was objectified by a sixth grader whilst walking down the hall... and I was almost my ex's crutch.

     I need to work on my game a little bit.