If I Were Allowed To Love You

Thirty-Eight

"Melissa!"

She spun around, surprised to find Lucas walking through the parking lot to her. She fiddled with her hands as she gazed up at him from under her eyelashes. Theo wasn't nearby, so she assumed he was still in the hotel room. That was a sure sign for her.

"Why aren't you with Theo?"

"Because I needed to make sure you were okay," he stated. "I didn't think you would still be here, though."

"I planned to wait a few more minutes and see if either one of you came out. If not, I would have called an Uber or something."

He nodded. "How long have you known about Theo being my mate?"

"I got the confirmation this morning before we came here. If you two are soulmates and made for one another, then that can't mean that we are as well."

"That may not be the truth."

"Why are you trying to fight your feelings for Theo?" she sighed. "I know you have them for him. You wouldn't have left to come stay here if you didn't think you did. You told me he was becoming your number one, and you had to leave to prevent it. You now know that there has been a second option for you all along. You are free to explore it."

"I know I am, but...it feels wrong," he admitted. "I told you I loved you and that I would only ever remain devoted to you. I told you that you would always be my number one, and yet I find out that there is someone else who is supposed to be my soulmate, and suddenly everything I felt for you is supposed to be thrown away? That doesn't seem right to me."

She smiled faintly. "What if you were meant to be with me so I could lead you to Theo when the time was right for you two to be together?"

"Huh?"

"If Theo didn't have to work years ago at Tamara's party, he would have been there. You two would meet, and you may not have wanted to go back to the circus. I wouldn't have had my outlet to help my father, and we would have been in debt and dying in a rundown trailer. Maybe you were meant to meet him now so I could be in a better situation. Now that my selfishness is gone, you have the chance to be happy with your mate."

"What you did was not selfish," Lucas stated.

"No, but I needed a way to help my father, and the only way I truly could was by leaving to join your circus. I took you away from the chance to meet your mate, but now that I'm in a better place, you can be with Theo. He's your mate for a reason. You should go be with him right now, celebrating the fact that you actually have a soulmate. One who will never leave you. You never have to worry about him not loving you or falling out of love with you. You have someone to spend eternity with. Not everyone gets that, so go be happy with him."

He gazed at her. "Are you sure you're going to be okay on your own?"

She nodded with a smile. "Positive." She ushered him towards the door, pushing against his back with a smile. "Now go be with your mate."

Lucas turned to face Melissa, kissing her cheek one last time before he ran back into the building. And she was glad he quickly turned away, because as happy as she was to see the pure joy in his eyes, she couldn't help but cry as she began to walk away from the hotel from no longer being the one to cause that look in his eyes.

But everything she said rang true for her as well. Was she meant to be with Ryan now instead of back then? Was it because of her father's stance on mythicals? Was it because she was destined to help bring a larger crowd to the circus? Though she knew for a fact that she was not ready to be with Ryan yet, she knew she wanted to hear the truth. She needed to know exactly what the truth was, because if he was her mate, she knew the hell she just went through would be all worth it sooner rather than later.