If I Were Allowed To Love You

Forty-One

"Wake up, darling," Ryan exclaimed as he flopped onto Melissa's bed. She groaned as she rolled over on the bed.

It had been a week since her panic attack over moving on, and each day it felt as though she was slowly moving on. It was difficult to be home alone while Ryan was at work, but she did enjoy the peaceful hours alone. However, the moment she heard his car pull into the driveway, she felt like a dog as she jumped up from the couch to greet him at the door. She could see the joy in his eyes each time she came to greet him, relieved that she was alive and well.

"Come on," he cooed as he peeled the blanket off her face. He leaned over her, staring into her eyes. She looked up at him, noticing the frown on his face. "Don't tell me you've been in bed all day."

"No. You woke me up early today, and I couldn't fall back asleep after. I took a nap."

"Well, it's six o'clock now."

"Who cares. Let me sleep."

"Now, now," Ryan chuckled as he flipped the covers off her and picked her up, carrying her out of her room and down the stairs. He plopped her down on the couch, sitting her on his lap. She rolled her eyes but didn't do anything as he turned on the TV. Melissa rested her head on Ryan's shoulder. She felt his arm pull around her, keeping her close. His fingers gently traced along her skin in tiny circles.

He'd been doing that a lot lately. She admitted she was enabling him, as she was tending to cuddle with him more and more. And she did allow him to place her in his lap at one point, which then caused it to become a more normal occurrence, but she enjoyed every second of it. The more she cuddled with him, the more it felt as though she was moving on from Lucas. Almost as though he was some form of a rebound.

And she didn't have to worry about him catching feelings, because he was mated to someone else. There were no everlasting feelings to be concerned over, allowing herself to indulge in the feelings she'd missed since breaking up with Lucas. All she could hope for was to eventually move on entirely. She knew that as long as she allowed her heart to move on, she would. She assumed that was why Ryan was alright with everything. He didn't mind doing those things for her, because he knew it was helping her to move on. That was what a rebound was for.

"And you were worried about coming home and flopping on the couch with me after work," she teased as she cuddled further into his chest. "I don't think you had anything to worry about."

"Except for the fact that I'm hungry and need to pee."

She laughed as she began to stand up, but he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her back onto his lap. "There's no reason for you to need to get up, you know."

"What did you just tell me?"

"I can handle a few more minutes if it means I get to hold you." A part of Ryan worried that he was laying a lot on her a little too fast, but he could tell Melissa was beginning to feel the mate bond. She was indulging in him, prompting her to cuddle with him and be held by him and let him kiss her on the head or cheek. His wolf constantly hummed whenever he held her, and he longed for the ability to hold her for so long. He hoped to never have to worry about saying goodbye, and with the way they'd been behaving, he didn't feel much of a need to.

Melissa swatted his hands away and stood up. She turned to face him, pointing at the bathroom and telling him, "Go."

He dramatically sighed as he stood up and walked to the bathroom. "Ruining all my fun."

"I'd prefer not to have you pee while I'm sitting on your lap." She walked into the kitchen and called out, "I can make a chicken and cheesy rice casserole. Does that sound good?"