My Lost Love | YiZhan

Chapter 23

I came back to my country, but I had no where to go. I chose Yibo over my parents and now I can't go back to them telling that he forgot me and I'm no longer a part of his life nor am I part of his memories. Yubin and Yang helped me to settle in another city, far from my home and got me a job at a famous company, which only required me to use my brain. Yubin asked me to stay away from the agency as I was weak, both physically and mentally, and that I might get killed if I was to go on a mission.

Yang kept updating me about Yibo and his conditions, through call, for over an year. Just the news of him made me happy, and made my heart content, and that became a reason for me to live. Yang also used to tell me about Yibo's weird behavior sometimes, wherein he used to run throughout the house searching for something, going through each and every room, and searching each and every corner of his house, as if that thing which he was searching for was the reason of his existence. Both Yang and I knew what he was searching for, but neither of us could do anything about it.

It was an year and a half, since we parted after that dreadful day. I was staring at our photo, imagining how we would have been, if everything went right, or how he would have been, if I hadn't entered his life in the first place. That was when I received Yang's call.

Ring... Ring...

"Hello! "

"Don't you think it's time for you to come back and claim what's yours?" The voice on the other line said.

"What? " I asked in shock.

"They are playing him. They are using him to their advantage. I can't bare to see him getting fooled. We gotta do something. We can't just sit still. His brain might get shocked if we suddenly reveal him about the truth, but what if we take it slowly? " Yang said.

"What do you mean? " I asked him.

"Come into his life, just like before, as an undercover. Be his PA. I'll get the things done. Spend time with him. Make him remember things slowly. Recreate all those memories which he treasures. We have to do this, Zhan. We can't let them use him. " Yang said.

"Yang, to be honest, I'm scared. I'm scared of rejection. I'll literally die if he doesn't remember me or rejects me after all this. I don't want to get my hopes up. " I said in a low voice.

"Save him, Zhan. Only you can save him. " Yang said.

Yes! I think it's time for me to go back. To go and get what belongs to me! To protect what belongs to me! NO... I can't fail this time. I have made up my mind.

I'LL SAVE YOU.

What's mine is MINE.

And that's when I decided to go back and to claim what's mine.

End of Flashback

........................................................................

I went back to the office with Yang. My heart was shattered into pieces. This is what I didn't want to happen. Getting my hopes up and later falling into a deep dark pit. I was tired because of crying my heart out.

"You're back. Thank god. I was thinking that you ran out to kill yourself. You always ruin my expectations. " Emily said with a smirk.

"Shut the fuck up, Emily Qi. " I said without looking at her.

"Emily, just fuck off and mind your fucking business. " Yang said.

"Ah, ah, yeah I'll fuck off..... With my love Yibo. " She said with a smirk.

"Stop fooling around, Emily Qi. " My pain was turning into anger now.

"Fooling around? Who's fooling around? I'm not the one pretending to be his fucking PA. " Emily scoffed.

"It'd be better if people knew their position. " Yang said.

"That's exactly what I'm telling, Mr. Xue Yang. People should know their positions. " Emily said.

Yes, she was confident now. Confident after stealing what belonged to me. What was mine.

"Yang, where were you? " There came my man, ah, sorry, he isn't mine anymore. I lost him long back.

"Let's go, Zhan. " Yang said, ignoring Yibo's question.

"Zhan, you look pale. Are you sick? " Yibo asked, as he walked towards me. He was about to put his hand on my forehead, but I moved backwards, avoiding his touch.
I can't let him touch him, I don't want him to care for me, I don't want him to look at me, I don't want him to smile at me or talk to me because that makes me fall in love with him all over again, everyday, every minute and every second. But that doesn't change anything. He won't be mine. I'm no longer a part of his life. I'm someone, who he doesn't even know.

He's my husband, but I'm not his.

"Why? Is something wrong? " Yibo's question brought me back to reality, but I couldn't answer him. Why? Because, everything was wrong.

"Nothing. He's just a bit tired. I'll drive him back. " Yang said.

"But---" Yibo was about to say something when Emily intervened.

"Bo, I'm hungry~~~" She whined.

"Let's go. " Yibo smiled at her.
"But, Zhan, are you really fine? If not, please take care. Don't stress yourself out. I don't know, but it makes me uncomfortable to see you like this. " He blurted out making my heart race and my eyes tear up.

"Thank you for your concern, Mr. Wang. I'll leave now. " I said lowering my head as I didn't want him to notice my tears.

"Yes, and ah, Zhan, guess I'll be troubling you much in the future. " Yibo chuckled.

"What do you mean? " Yang spoke in my stead.

"Well, the thing is that, a big event is coming up. " Emily said and blushed.

"And what is that? " Yang asked.
I was very anxious and was feeling dizzy.

"We're getting married. I want to marry her. I don't want to lose her again. So, me and Emily decided to get married. " Yibo said with a huge smile on his face.

That was it. My dreams are once again shattered and I once again fell into that dark pit. That dark pit, filled with pain, fear, longing and loneliness.
Maybe he was never mine. Maybe this was my fate. I guess we were never destined to be together. And he was never destined to be mine. How I wish all this was a dream, from the day I met him, to until now. But still, I will really miss him, even if it's just a dream. If it's a dream, I never want to wake up no matter how dreadful this dream is. I will endure all the pain, just to see that smile on his face.
It doesn't matter if he never remembers me, as long as he's happy with that bright smile on his face. All I pray to God is to always keep him happy, even if I'm not by his side.