SHUT UP. ( K. COSENTINO )

072.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* LIFE *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

DELANEY HAD BARRICADED HERSELF IN HER ROOM and she stared at the ceiling in a trance. She hadn't cried since she shut the door and she took that as a good sign but she knew it wasn't. She hated that Ryland had chosen her actions for her, something that everyone always seemed to do. Nobody ever let her feel the way that she wanted to feel.

She picked up her phone and pulled up Kairi's number, her finger hovering over the facetime option. Delaney didn't even know if she wanted to speak to him right now but she needed to finally do what she wanted to do. She wanted to be her own person for once.

The phone only rang for a couple seconds before Kairi's face found its place on the screen, his eyebrows furrowing as he looked at the expression on her face. He noticed how exhausted she looked, the bags under eyes only brining more attention to the redness that lined her actual eyes.

"Hey, are you okay?"

Delaney didn't say anything, only nodded as he scoffed and sat up from his spot in his bed. He knew that she was lying, he knew her well enough to tell that there was something bothering her and he wasn't going to just let her pretend she was fine like she always tried to do.

"Do you still think you're in love with me?" She finally asked, her voice so soft that he had barely heard the words and still he froze. He hadn't expected this conversation to happen so soon. Of course, he knew the answer and it hadn't ever changed, but he didn't know how to say it outright.

Kairi took a deep breath and mimicked her nod, the look on her face only causing his stomach to drop. She looked like the confession was causing her inescapable pain and the idea of that only made him feel sick to his stomach.

"Why—"

"Did you tell Ryland?" She blurted, staring at the phone as his mouth dropped at the question. He thought back into his earlier conversation with the boy and when he realized that he hadn't ever told Ryland that he was still in love Delaney.

"No. He told me about Nick earlier but I never said anything. Nobody knows," Kairi told her the honest truth and frowned as Delaney wiped at her eyes with her free hand. She sniffled after and all Kairi wanted to do was fly across the country and make sure she was okay. All he wanted was for her to be happy.

"Why me, Kai? I have done nothing but ever make you hurt because I was hurting. I pushed you away and I kept pushing—"

"Delaney, you are the one person in the entire world that had ever made me feel like I could do soemthing right, okay? You make me feel like I have a chance to be happy with somebody who wouldn't do anything to hurt me because you know how it feels to be hurt. I'm in love with you because you've never had the time to love yourself," Kairi cut her off and Delaney fell silent at his words.

She wanted to tell him that he was lying and that he didn't know who she was but she knew that it was a lie and he knew exactly who she was. He always found his way back after she forced him to leave and it still shocked her every single time he did so.

Kairi waited for her to speak but she just stared at him with a frown on her face, the tear glistening in the light of her room as it fell down her cheek. He wanted her to say soemthing — no matter if it was telling him to fuck off or telling him that he was loved back, he just wanted her to talk. The silence always made him feel like he was going to be sick with anticipation of incoming rejection.

Delaney still couldn't form a sentence with the thoughts that bounced around inside her head. She had tried to be in love with Ryland for the past three weeks and, truly, she had thought she finally was. Now she just realized that she had love for him. She wasn't in love with him.

She was in love with Kairi.

She always had been, even when it hurt to hear his name or see his face on her screen. She was in love with him and she didn't know why or how, but she loved him and she loved him in ways that she never did with Ryland Storms.

The realization made her want to scream. She wanted to cry and curl up in a ball and never leave her room but she realized that Ryland had known it since day one. She realized that he had tried to make her love him like she loved Kairi but there was no use in trying to change something that was set in stone.

"I love you."

Kairi looked up from his lap at the sound of her voice and fought back a smile. There was no way that he had heard her right. There was no way that she had just said the three words that he had been waiting to hear since the first day they had finally met. There was no way that she was in love with him.

"What'd you say?" He asked, begging for her to prove his ears wrong so that this made it so much easier for him to process. He knew how to handle heartbreak, in fact, he was quite good at it. It didn't even bother him anymore, but love? He didn't know how to handle that when it was given back as much he gave it out.

Delaney ghosted a smile and took a deep breath, her smiling falling off her face for a second and no longer than it. She looked at him and the way he stared at her, her heart beating out of her chest at the way he made her feel. She should have known this from the jump. She should've known he made her feel ways that nobody else did.

"I love you, Kairi."

this was rushed i'm getting sushi