Her Smile- A Lapidot Human Au Fanfic

You are worth stepping out of class for

⚠️ slight angst warning and the topic of rape is heavily discussed ⚠️

Lapis's POV

I sat in class half listening to the professor's lecture. I took out my laptop and checked in on Peridot back at home, sending the notes from the class we would be taking together.

Opening her contact, I noticed it showed that she was typing. I stopped to see what she was gonna say.

Peridot: Lapis, it's happening again.
Lapis: Ok. Be there in a few minutes. Can you sit tight?
Peridot: I dunno
Lapis: tell ya what, I'll ft you until I'm there.
Peridot: ok.

I excused myself from the lecture and put in my earbuds, calling her. She picked up a teary mess. The video was shaking and she was loudly sobbing.

"Baby, what happened?" I asked her in the same softer tone I always use when she's scared.

She didn't respond, but I could tell was trying to, only getting out a broken stutter.

"It's ok," I repeatedly reassure her over the phone, picking up my pace to reach her. I decide not to take the old-ass elevator. Too many risk factors. I run down the stairs then across campus, phone still in my hands and her still on the other line. I reach the dorm building across campus fairly quickly.

"I'm just outside the dorm building. I should be there really soon," I reassure her.

I step in the elevator and press the number of our floor. There were two other people on the elevator; one trying to make small talk but I ignored him.

     "Damn, you girls and your phones. Ya never get off em'" he said chuckling. This pissed me off. He didn't know the situation. If he had a significant other who was raped and having a panic attack, and face timing them to reassure them until he's there to console them, he wouldn't be so judgmental. I wanted to scream that at him, but I couldn't think straight from all my worry, so I shot him a cold glare. He was unfazed, but it startled Peridot, making me immediately feel awful.

      The elevator got to my floor and I sprinted out, looking for the dorm room number. I reached the dorm and turned the key to see my girlfriend on the floor in fetal position, crying, shaking and holding her phone.

I rush up to her, kneeling down beside her.

"Honey, sweetie it's ok it's ok I'm right here," I tell her. I hang up the phone and take out my earbuds.

She looks up at me, immediately curling up beside me, our bodies not touching, but still close. I understand not wanting to be touched at the moment.

"It's ok sweetie, you're safe. You're safe. I got you. You're with me. It's ok," I reassure her more, watching her tears run down her chin and drop to the floor.

"Do you wanna sit on the couch?" I ask her. She looks up at me with fearful, teary eyes, but gets up and curls up on the couch. I sit beside her and she rests her head on my lap.

"I-I'm sorry you have to see me like this," she chokes out. "I know I don't look very pretty when I cry," she says hiding her face.

"Hey, it's ok. It's ok. Cry as long as you need to. That doesn't matter right now," I reassure her. I feel my skirt get wet from her tears, but don't care.

"Please stay with me. I'm scared," she says meekly. Those words broke my heart to hear. The vulnerability and fear in her voice made me feel even more protective of her.

"I'll stay as long as you need me, my darling. Unless you want me to, I'm not going anywhere," I reassure her. "When you're ready to talk, I'll listen, but if you don't want to talk, I won't force you to."

We sit for a minute. I feel her shaking go down slightly. That's a good sign.

      "I- can I tell you w-what happened?" She asked still sounding afraid.

      I calmly tell her "of course. I'm here to listen."

She takes a deep breath and begins explaining.

"I was talking to my family over FaceTime and they wouldn't stop blaming me for what happened. They asked if maybe I wasn't loud enough asking her not to, saying lesbian rape doesn't exist and it threw me over the edge when they asked to see what I was wearing. It was torn off by her. I told them it was a black tank top, a blue cardigan and jeans and-" she cut herself off, sobbing more.

"Look, you don't have to look me in the eyes, but I need you to remember that it wasn't your fault. None of it was your fault," I tell her.

She nods and picks up where she left off. "They said how the drug she used couldn't have entered my body without my consent. They told me I could have just left. I tried to explain but it hurt too much. I hung up the phone and fell apart."

I nodded. "You didn't deserve any of what happened to you. She has no excuse for what she did. They have no excuse for victim shaming you. Just know that nothing she did to you was your fault."

     She let out another choked sob.

     "I know. I know. It's ok baby," I tell her.

     We sit in another odd silence.

       "May I pet your hair?" I ask her.
    She nods as I begin brushing my fingers through.

       "You've made it through so much. You're getting better every day. I can see it. With every day, you grow stronger. You can get through this, and I'll be with you every step of the way," I tell her.

      "Y-You really think so?" She asks looking up at me.

      "I know so," I tell her. "Want some ice cream?" I ask her preparing to get up.

       "Sure," she says.

     With that, I get up and walk over to the freezer to get her the frozen treat.