Pages From My Journal

JUSTICE FOR FLOYD

When I think about what's happening in the states right now. I can only think of praying.

When this year began, it didn't begin on the most pleasant note and someone very close to me taught me, how to build a relationship with God.

I'd amateurly start off, "Hi god! Long time. It's Chhavi by the way. I stay in Bengaluru and I've been out of contact for too long. But here I am.

God, I believe in you, I trust you and I put all of me in you. I submit."

And just like that I know that he's right behind me, as if holding the edge of my cycle seat, when I go pedalling away without trainer wheels for the first time.

Praying isn't just begging god. It's loving him. Thanking him. Thanking him for my body, mind, soul and heart. My organs, my smile, my parents, friends. My house, car, garden everything.

Then praying for the well-being and good health all those things. Because even though his love is inexhaustible, I feel the urge to pay for them. Because life is hard, but life is a gift. George's life was a gift. And I'm thankful for that. I'm thankful for what he taught us all, how he opened our eyes. The government (hopefully) and the people.

Everyday, so many people die for similar reasons. And along with Floyd, a silent prayer in their name is what matters most according to me. Not just making a big deal of how few people are racist and that they must be stopped and jailed.

Because honestly, that's not in our god damn hands. Spreading awareness is great, but exposing negativity isn't. And I hope we can all contribute to everyone who's suffering equally.

I apologise to everyone who tagged me in the #blacklivesmatter stories on Instagram. I couldn't bring myself to put it on mine.

But I am sending my love, prayers and care to him differently. God will take care of him in heaven and help his loved ones cope through this tough ordeal.

And indeed, one day things will be brighter. Like the most artistic and poetic caste say, Inshallah!