(Reminder: The dialogues in single quotes are self thought)
JACKSON'S POV (finally)
I stare in the space thinking about the person lying in my arms. He got hurt, again. Again, because of that imbecile bastard who didn't know when to stop.
I hear a shuffle beside me, my eyes drift to Arne frowning in his sleep. I place my fingers to his forehead, giving him the circular strokes to calm him down and it did work. I sigh at the exposure in front of me, his eyes were puffy from all the crying, his face was drenched with new tears which were escaping his eyes unknowingly. He would wake up every two hours calling the bastard's name and bawling again.
I feel defeated. I wanted to slaughter his existence but couldn't help with Arne watching. I could do everything for him. I just want him to be happy. I just want my best friend to smile.
Best friend?
'Hah! Who am I lying to?'
I liked Arne ever since I knew I was gay. And I loved him ever since I knew what actually love is. Funny, right? That I have loved him for fucking seven years and am still his best friend.
His only best friend.
Well until Feivel showed up. At first, I saw him as no threat until they got close enough to suffocate me. It was okay cause Arne read between the lines and kept his distance to Feivel in my presence. He knew I was possessive for him.
It was still okay until Arne came out to me. I still remember the day when I caught him staring at Feivel with twinkle in his eyes.
--------flashback---------
"You better speak up, pumpkin. That bastard gets more attention and care than me. And I need a reason" I huffed sounding dramatic.
This caught him off guard, while I notice a bright red spread across his cheeks which made me freeze in my soles.
There goes my sanity.
He looks fucking adorable.
'Oh wait! Why is he blushing?'
"You're hiding something, aren't you, pumpkin?" I deadpan making his blue orbs wide.
"N-no! I'm not! I-I'm not h-hiding anything" he stammers making my doubt deepen.
Arne had a habit of stammering whenever he got anxious or nervous. Only I got to know about this. No one else. I get a point here. Yay!!
"Yes, you are. Now spit or I'm not taking you to the fancy diner, downtown" I typically blackmail him but you know, it was needed.
"No! Fine! I-"
'Yes!' Arne and food can never go wrong. He would sell his soul to satan for food. *evil laugh*
"I? I what, Arne?"
"I-i'm crushing on someone!" he exclaims, the colour deepening at his cheeks.
"O-okay. And who is that?"
"F-feivel" he states covering his face in his hands.
I take a deep breath at the already known fact before I force smile.
I was mad!
"Hmm... Good luck then. It won't be easy, pumpkin"
He shoots his head up with wide eyes.
"Y-you're not angry?" he questions with pure horror written on his face.
"What?" I laugh to ease the tension. "Why would I be angry?" I was angry, I was literally fuming.
"T-that I'm gay?"
"You know what? I bat for the same team too" I exclaim making his eyes wider like they were about to burst.
"Why didn't you tell me? Oh god!"
"You never asked and I didn't feel like it was really needed until now" I shrug.
"Well, yeah. Jacky?" I hum in reply. "I don't think I'm really gay" I look at him confused.
"You just confessed it, Arne. It's not funny" I answer with a serious tone.
"No! No, I didn't mean to. I was just saying that I never feel sexually attracted to any other male other than Fei" he explains as I nod in understanding.
"I mean look at you, Jacky. You are one of the hottest men alive. You are total mf buffet. Do you know how many girls and guys have asked me if you were single?" This was my turn to blush. I felt my cheeks getting hot just when he interrupted.
"But, I didn't get attracted to you"
OUCH
I take deep breathes trying to keep myself calm at his stupid innocence.
'Oh, God!'
"Well, thanks I guess? But that was rude, pumpkin. You making me doubt myself now" I huffed. He giggles with a sorry.
--------end of flashback--------
Then, I stayed for him when he needed me and the day when Arne told me that Feivel came out to him as a bisexual, I thought this would make them end up together somehow and I will leave the town for Canada to complete my masters. It was more than enough I had until now, I can't anymore.
Just for once in life, I wanted to get selfish and get a life.
But today. Today, broke all my resolutions. Arne was here with a tear-stained face, away from his crush and was brutally hurt by the same crush. Just when I thought I would distance myself, it ended like this. I couldn't leave him yet.
Maybe.....? No-no-no.
I can't.
I can't confess my feelings when I know he is broke. What if I lose him? No-no-no.
Fuck this!
I lunge trying to get out of the bed quietly to feel a tug at my wrist.
"D-don't l-leave m-me, please" Arne cries making me freeze before I take him into my arms, cooing him.
"Shh, I'm sorry. I'm not going anywhere, pumpkin. Shh"
"Fei!" he cries making my heart shatter into pieces.
'Why him? Why fucking him?' Tears gush down my cheeks as my heart clench.
My heart? If only it was still there.
"Why him, pumpkin? Why not me?" I sob alongside him as he drifts into a deep slumber again, leaving me a crying mess.
Why him?
-----------------------
HEY THERE!
AN UPDATE IN A ROW. YAY!!
I FEEL BAD FOR JACKSON. COME HERE LET MUMMA GIVE YOU A HUG, SON.
THERE HAVE BEEN EMOTIONAL CHAPTERS FOR WHILE. I'M SORRY BUT YOU HAVE TO COPE FOR SOME MORE.
VOTE AND COMMENT YOUR THOUGHTS.
UNTIL NEXT TIME. LOVE YA!
HAVE A GREAT DAY🖤
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Gay for you
Romance[COMPLETED] Arne Cabral, an eighteen-year-old boy who is in love with his best friend. His *male* best friend. But, being a heterosexual all his life he had not felt anything towards other men but Feivel. Was he gay? Or was he gay for Feivel? Feivel...
