Spice!

Chapter 17

''Rin,'' Len called out, knocking at her door. His sister answered, allowing him into her room, so he pushed the door open, walking in.

His sister was already prepared for school, as usual. She smiled at him. ''Len! What do you want for breakfast? I'm going to make it now.''

''Wait, Rin,'' Len hesitated. Should he say this, really? She's my sister.

Rin looked at him, gaze curious. ''Yes, Len?''

''I like you,'' the words gushed out in a flood. ''I've liked you as more than just a sister, Rin, ever since we were children. And I can't stand seeing you with Kaito anymore.''

Rin's eyes widened momentarily, and she looked stunned, as though she had no idea what to say. Who could blame her? Were Len to be in her shoes, he would be stumped at this sudden confession, too.

''Len,'' Rin said softly. ''I know that. And you can't, because you're my little brother. We can't get into a relationship with each other. Besides, you don't love me, Len.''

''I do! What makes you think I don't?'' he protested. Rin winced and smiled faintly, shaking her head.

''You don't love me. What you love is what I represent - you love me as a sister, as a mother, but not how you'd love a lover.''

''But Rin -'' Len spoke up again. She held out a hand, indicating she hadn't finished speaking.

''As for the lust, Len, what you wanted had always been nothing but yourself,'' she said, in that same quiet tone. She walked over to her full-length mirror, beckoning him to her, and somewhat reluctantly he went to stand next to her.

Rin took off her trademark white ribbon, then taking a rubber band off her dresser, she tied her hair up into a small ponytail, just like his. Len stared at her reflection in the mirror, standing next to his.

His twin sister looked...exactly like him now. And the strangest thing was, he didn't feel any single amount of desire. Not at all. Once, he had desired Rin, but now no longer.

''See, Len?'' Rin whispered, and he wasn't sure which twin was which in the mirror, save for their different clothing. If it weren't for the clothing, he would have thought they were the exact same person, they looked so similar.

''Once I look exactly like you, you don't desire me anymore. You had always wanted me because I was the female version of yourself.''

''So I've been lying to myself my whole life?'' Len stared into the eyes of his sister's reflection. She nodded sadly, her eyes meeting his.

''Don't regret it, Len. Take it as a lesson learnt, if so. Kaito and I are happy together,'' she smiled wistfully. ''I'm sure that you'll find someone of your own, as well.'' Her smile turned sly. ''Speaking of which, who did you have in your room last night?''

Len felt his cheeks warm. ''What are you talking about, Rin?'' he asked innocently.

''You know exactly what I'm talking about, Len,'' Rin said, tone wicked. ''I happened to reach home earlier than usual last night, and I'm quite sure I heard a girl screaming.''

Oh, God.

''It was the television,'' Len lied lamely. ''I switched it on too loud.''

''Really, Len?'' Rin arched an eyebrow, again looking uncannily like him. ''I believe that, I really do.'' There was enough sarcasm in her voice to cut through butter, and Len sighed, knowing that if he didn't admit anything his sister would pester him to death.

''Miku Hatsune,'' he admitted reluctantly. ''She was with me last night. She was screaming because she saw a spider in my room.''

''So the moans of 'Len, oh Len' were coming from you, I assume?''

Damn, how much had Rin managed to hear?

''Shut up, Rin,'' he scowled, turning around to leave her room. Rin giggled.

''You like her,'' Rin sang childishly. ''I knew it, Len! You two are perfect for each other. Ever since middle school! You're such a cute couple!''

Len paused. ''She already has a boyfriend, Rin,'' he mumbled guiltily. ''I...I shouldn't have done what I did, last night.''

Rin groaned. ''Len!'' she chided. ''Are you really that desperate to get laid?''

''No!'' he snapped, feeling faintly embarrassed. ''I just...I don't know.'' Hastily, Len made his exit before she could interrogate him further.

Do I like Miku that way? Is that why I have this need to know her, to be close to her?

Is it her that I've liked all along?

No, that wasn't possible. After all, Len had only started noticing her only recently, though they had been classmates ever since middle school.

He had thought she was pretty, even back in middle school, he remembered, but he had never noticed her the way he did now.

Because your mind was overshadowed by thoughts of Rin, which turns out to be just desire for your own reflection.

He ignored his thoughts. Sighing, he went to his room, preparing to change for school. Sitting on the edge of his bed, he wondered if he could sleep in a little more before going down for breakfast.

Inhaling deeply, he froze as the familiar rose scent hit him. Miku's scent. Instantly he yearned for her, wanting her though she wasn't anywhere near him.

Though she had fled from him without saying goodbye.

Why do I want someone who so obviously doesn't want me? Someone who's already attached. To one of my good friends, nevertheless.

Len sighed, reaching out for his pillow. Burying his face in it, he inhaled, smelling the sweetness of rose-scented shampoo. He wanted the owner of that scent.

I want Miku, even if she can't stand me. I want her, even though she's the girlfriend of Gakupo. Maybe I wanted her, even when I thought I wanted Rin.

Maybe it's her I've liked all along.

The realisation hit him, and he blinked, suddenly unsure. Did he? He couldn't tell, couldn't be sure. But...he didn't know.

I just want to see her again.