The Bullies' Slave 1

29- WHAT ARE YOU EVEN THINKING?!

29- WHAT ARE YOU EVEN THINKING?!

"Wow." I said. Drew had driven us to a very beautiful park.  "What is this place?"

"This is called Tom McCall Waterfront Park." Andrew said. "You really are new to Portland."

He led us further into the park and I continued to gaze awestruck at the river as we walked. We stopped to sit on a wooden bench, covered by the shade of a tree.

"This is beautiful! You come here often?" I asked. He smiled a weary smile.

"Yeah." I nodded. I took in a deep breath before I started.

"I'm sorry for sneaking up on you like this. But I know you, Drew. Even if I had texted, you wouldn't have replied. You shut people out with the speed of lightening!" As usual, he didn't show any emotion, staying silent. I almost groaned but I continued nevertheless.

"I spoke with Ethan today. He was the one who led me to you." Drew closed his eyes, briefly muttering 'Sure'.

"I made him tell me where you were. He didn't have much of a choice." He still didn't utter a word. Well, at least from the way his body was alert as he sat, I knew he was listening. And that was what I needed.

"I lost my mum about three years ago. It was in a car accident. We were all in that car, my family." I inhaled deeply then exhaled as I braced myself for what I was about to do. I had never shared this with anyone, except two friends of mine back at Boise, since that fateful day. I noticed Drew's body went rigid. He still didn't say anything, neither did he spare me a glance.

"It was her birthday, a Saturday. We had all gone on a 'road trip' from Boise to Yellowstone National Park the previous day and were returning that day. She had wanted us to have enough time to rest and gather enough strength for her birthday thanksgiving the next day, which was a Sunday." I smiled as I remembered her beaming as she rolled out all activities to celebrate her birthday.

"No one had seen that approaching trailer. Everything had happened in seconds. My brother had screamed 'mom' just as I heard the last noise that sent me into a coma. I had passed out for a whole day only to wake up to..." I stalled as I took in a ragged breath. It was like I was opening up a fresh wound. But I just had to do it! "... to hear the news" I whispered.

A tear slid across my cheek but I hurriedly wiped it away. This wasn't the time for emotions. Drew spared me a glance this time and what I saw made me shocked. His eyes were teary. I hid my surprise because he was never the type to show his emotions, much less to me whom he barely knows. I continued,

"My dad had blamed himself because he had let her drive instead of him. He wished he was the one dead, not her. We all blamed ourselves for not being vigilant enough but it was all futile. We knew we had to move on. Somehow..." I sniffed as I stood up. I turned to face him.

"So permit me to claim 'understanding' with you, Drew. We've all been through a lot, it just might not be on the same scale. Not only did we all lose their mum, we had lost their dad as well." He finally turned to look at me. "Yeah, my dad had abandoned us. He was as good as dead to us. It was just recently that he reached out to us and made us move here to Portland. Well, we didn't have a choice because we couldn't starve to death." I chuckled humorlessly. Life was full of complexities. Our rich dad had left us to suffer.

I felt a heavy weight suddenly lift off my shoulders. It felt nice to finally be able to talk to someone about all these. I had been grieving all these years, hurting and hating. But with Drew, I kind of find an understanding. He did not have to utter a word to let me know he understood how I had felt. He had felt it too and obviously still does.