A Thousand Moments

Chapter 2- A Shooting Star

Alanna Sky Bauer

The sun was already setting so we decided to go home. By the time I arrived, it was already dark.

I went to the garage, and there was no sign of dad's car.

I guess he's still at work or drinking himself to sleep at some bar.

It's funny how I'm not surprised or even worried anymore, things have always been like this for the past years. It's like living in a film where after the movie finishes instead of moving on to the next one it just keeps on repeating, until little by little you memorize each part of it and nothing ever comes as a surprise to you.

I went to my sister's bedroom to look around. I am missing her so much right now and sometimes being in her room helps ease up that feeling.

I took the picture frame inside her closet, it was a picture of us back when we were little kids with both of my parents.

Dad locked away every single photo of our family but my sister kept this one hidden here, so this is the only one that's left.

I hate staring at photos because it reminds me that I don't have any memory of those anymore, I look at a picture and remember nothing, it feels like I am a stranger to myself and a stranger to my own memories.

I hate pictures but I don't know why I always stare at this one. It's funny how you can love and hate the same thing at once. Maybe one of the reasons why I stare at this is because I love how I can see my dad smiling ear to ear, my sister hugging me, mom was alive, and me...

I wonder if I was happy back then.

Did I play and throw tantrums like a little kid?

How did my parents calm me down?

Did me and my sister fight like how siblings fought?

What was my favorite bedtime story?

Did they sing me a lullaby when I can't sleep?

I ask myself a lot of questions and it hurts that I don't even know the answer to any of those.

After the accident my dad never told me anything about my life, he kept his distance and avoided me.

My sister, unlike my father, tried her best to help me, she took care of me when I couldn't take care of myself. She'd sometimes talk to me about how her day went and other times she'd just sit beside me and cry.

Everyday was hell for her, I see her and dad fighting all the time until time came, she couldn't take it anymore and left without even a single goodbye.

I was clueless about my life but no one was there to help me anymore. My dad pretends I don't exist and my sister left me. I was suffering, struggling to answer questions about my own life.

As I was lost in my own thoughts, I heard a car pull up in our driveway.

Dad must be home.

I heard a loud banging on our door.

Geez chill.

I opened the door to find my drunk father lying on the ground.

Fucking hell.

"Dad wake up" I mumbled as I try to wake him