Tears, Mistakes & Heartache

Chapter 2 - Hero's Summer Memories

WEEK THREE

After wasting my first two weeks in a state of nothing but feeling sorry for myself I was finally attempting to get myself out of the rut I was in, I still hated the amount of appointments I was stuck going to but I pushed myself anyway.

"Hero man come on you have to go and get this check-up done it's with someone new" Freddie had whined at me

I groaned and stropped all around the flat but that didn't stop him dragging my ass to the local hospital so they could run the same tests as I had in London, I complained about the waste on the NHS resources but apparently they needed to see if the levels had changed so they could work out what the next level of therapy I needed was going to be.

While I waited for the results, I had finally built up the courage to check out Emily's social media and found that she was in Florida with her sister, she was enjoying cocktails and the sun. I hoped that maybe the sun and the time with her sister would help her to clear her head and finally answer my calls or even my messages at least that is what I was silently praying for.

My thoughts were interrupted as always "Mr. Fiennes Tiffin" the balding little man in front of me had said looking at me like I was some waster "your brain injury is still reparable without surgery but it will take more time for everything to settle than everyone was originally hoping" I shrugged my shoulders like I gave a shit, right at that moment all I could think of was Emily and how I really wanted to just fly to Florida but I couldn't because I had no idea how to find her once I was there and they sure as hell wouldn't let me fly with this bloody TBI.

Freddie had listened to the new specialist and sat with him making the arrangements that were needed, I caught him saying that he was down here staying with me while my girlfriend was away visiting family. The look on the old mans face pissed me off and I stood up and left, fuck the therapy I don't care anymore.

"Oi bruv" fuck me his voice had been bugging the shit out of me throughout his stay with me "what the fuck was that?"

I gave him my usual way of communication at that time and just shrugged my shoulders, he barked at me to try using fucking words making half the car park turn to face us pissing me off even more so I let every fucking word fall from my mouth as soon as we were in the car and heading back to the house

"he looked at me like I was scum, like I was a fucking waster and what the fuck are you doing telling him about Emily!" I had screamed at my best mate

I had sat there in silence as he had driven us straight back to my flat, I remember making it back to the sofa when he finally decided to open his mouth to respond to me I guess he had finally thought of a reply or maybe it was because he wanted to be away from other people and not having to concentrate on the road because shit did he go for me.

"Do you know what Hero" I had barely lifted my head to acknowledge him "we are all worried sick about you but yet again your being an absolute prick" I let out a chuckle "don't fucking laugh at me you wanna know why I told the Doctor she was away?" he had finally gained my attention my hands clawing at my legs as I tried to keep them from killing him as I sat up straight glaring at him "because I didn't want him to find out why your really in this state I didn't want to tell him your lack of concern for your health is because you're an egotistical dickhead who deserves to be suffering right now"

I had no idea how I got to my feet that day but something inside me snapped and before I knew it my best friend was dangling against my wall with my hand around his throat my fist smashing into the wall next to him and my face finally showing some emotion as I watched the color drain from his face

"Go on then fucking hit me if it makes you feel better but it won't bring her back it wont change what you did it wont change the fact you lost her or that it was all your fault" that day I lost even more when I punched my best mate in the face and let him slump to the floor while I smashed up all of the photos she had framed for our flat.