Just One Night

12. Tapping the terrible

CHAPTER-12

TAPPING THE TERRIBLE

Sarah

--

I am stupid. I am a fucking stupid woman. Stupid, stupid. Stupid. Shit.

I exhale.

I  can't calm my horses, right? Why did I do it again? What they say about the person who acts as such, they are right. Hell, they are wrong.

Am I insane to think like this? Yes, how can I call myself a whore. I. am .not.

But.

What was I thinking?

Calm the hell down.

It doesn't matter now, does it? I just tagged myself as a whore. The worst kind. Guilt overtakes me once more thinking of the woman I have only seen in magazines and from meters away who I just ruined. That man was engaged.

How can I? What was I thinking?

I begin to curse myself again. I have become that other woman who has clawed the most wanted man in the city.

I roll my eyes at the last thought.
What am I? An angle straight down from heaven?

Don't fool yourself. You were just for the night to fulfil the transpired ecstasy. Nothing more, nothing less.

But what was that shine that I saw in his beautiful blueish deep eyes?

I am so oblique.

I walk down the path slowly. My dress is haywire. My hair is messed up. I am an absolute wreck.

I look back at the road as if expecting someone to pick me up. But I know I won't find anyone.

Daniel Coaster is engaged and he isn't for me and never will ever be.

But .....

I have reached so far away from him. He probably couldn't find me. He must be looking for me.

My feet stop dead and my head turns in my direction. I wish to find him smiling at me and then winking in playfulness. I could now see him coming towards me.

But then he vanishes and the streets come back to normal. The insane normal.

Reality finally catches up as I begin to see through. The rush and commotion around me.

I am imagining.

Are people coming or going? Who knows? Some people walk with the infallible determination of being in the right direction, I wonder if I had been that sure of anything. Some are simply looking around deciding which direction to take. Probably I am like that. I am still to find my path to everything: Love, successful life of at least basic needs, love.

Daniel Coaster.

Is he thinking about me now?

I bite my lips and stand amid confusion, hatred of myself, and poise. Of all, hatred seems to conquer and I run away in shame. I would be anything but not the woman to steal another woman's man. Hatred for oneself will only destroy me.

Don't I deserve a man who would love me?

I had one.

It's been long. And suddenly I remember him.

Taylor was nice to me.

Stop it, Sarah.

I calm myself. I hail a cab and reach my new home for a whole being.

...

Carl has been my knight for like always. After I got thrown from my apartment a week ago, he put me in his small apartment until I sorted mine despite the lack of space for himself. He says what are friends for when I am his bae.

I graze my face looking at myself in the metallic mirror of Carls's small bathroom. My mind takes me to him. And in seconds I speculate of a hundred different possibilities right now. Like Daniel Coater visiting me.

Like Daniel Coaster visiting me to tell me how he has stopped the wedding.

Like Daniel...

Fuck, Sarah.

"Get it together, princess."

I gaze at zero only to circle at those imaginary possibilities again. But this time the ailment of the bathroom put me out of my misery. It's messed up more than the other days by one side. It's ailing. But He made sure to give me a clean space only to ness the other part. I am indecisive about whether to touch his things but then end up cleaning his things. I proceed to do the same to the other part of the apartment (with a single bedroom connecting the almost attached living room) except for his space. As it was me disturbing the whole plan, I kept away to at least not take away his privacy.

Why the hell did you let me in, Carl? I can reach everything in your room.

A sudden feeling of gratefulness and shame overtook me. I am pledged to find a place and job within a week.

"Damn, if it were a piece of cake. " I look on the ground and at the papers, I sorted to apply. I take a deep breath, pick up my laptop, sit down on the floor and begin it apply for them. The profiles aren't just for journalists or even writers but for anything and everything I am eligible for.

It takes me an hour to draft, review, and then send my resume to the companies. When I am done, I head straight to take a bath and knock on the door to physically ask for jobs. Well, that's something.

With self-deprecating thoughts about how I will rock in, I charge and open the door of the apartment to forget everything for a moment and skip on to a whole different level of thinking. About the person standing before me.

How did he find me?

Why did he find me?

Is he stalking me?

Or is he here for Carl? Does can't know him?

God please, he should be here for me. Crazy, why?

"You." I blurt.

" Hii." He says and grins a little unsavoury. What is the feeling victorious about?

"How did you find me?" I ask thinking of all the substantial questions again.

"Sarah Cole."

Okay.

He points a finger at me and repeats victoriously, " You are Sarah Cole. "

"And now I know you." He says with a sudden spark of determination in his eyes that takes me off guard.

"I know you, Sarah. "

---

Hope you like it.
Love you guys.

Do leave votes and comments behind.

Follow me on Instagram @_apricotlove_