Growing Up

Broken Promises

Billy walked down to The Shed; the place we went to the night before. He was going to end it all. 

He walked inside the poorly lit room, he sat at the table. ‘I want to be right for Milly but I don’t think that I can. Maybe it would be better if I just left.’ Still contemplating with himself he swiped the knife and made a horrid line.

He was over thinking he didn’t want to do it but it was the only way he thought he could get rid of the bad feelings. ‘Billy if there is ever anything you want to talk about I will be here.’ Milly’s voice rang loud in his head but he just couldn’t let it go all the pain. He had lost all trust in any woman when he lost his mother. ‘Slash’-he hadn’t realized that he had cut himself, so many things were going on at once-the blood was coming out too fast, he screamed. Billy passed out.

            Hours went by when he finally woke up on the cold hard granite floors. ‘What the hell happened to me? I feel so weak.’ He looked at his hand; it was pail encrusted in blood, cold from not having enough of the red stuff, he could see everything. ‘Shit!!! Milly is going to kill me.’ Billy had promised to Milly that he wouldn’t hurt her anymore. He said he was going to stop. He couldn’t remember anything from last night all he heard was Milly and that she loved him.

            He got up slowly, still drained from loosing so much blood. He had to beat Milly, before she could see his car outside. His eyes were a honey crystal color, his hair was matted down, and he really needed a shower. The smell of blood lingered. He walked as fast as he could. Only two blocks, when the sun rose from behind the majestic mountains. He only had twenty minutes to get to his car…the clock was ticking.

He found himself praying to God, a God he didn’t believe in, the one he constantly blamed for all the shit in his life. The one who he’d question, who he’d thought he’d lost so many years ago. He’d pray that she’d find some way to forgive him. He found himself trying to run.

He ran into…