break the heartbreaker : luke

maurine

they say that pain changes people.

whenever i heard that quote in movies, or read that line in books, i'd never understood what it meant.

how can pain change people?

can pain change the way a person dresses? can pain change the way a person acts? can pain change how a person thinks?

can pain change a persons attitude? can pain change the way people see things? can pain change the way people react to things?

after everything that happened, i finally understood what that saying meant. and, yes, pain does indeed change people.

i found that saying to be completely true as i witnessed pain change maurine, my ex-best friend.

the pain luke inflicted on her consumed her so much, in the most unhealthy way possible.

unlike some people, maurine didn't use that pain to become stronger. unlike some people, maurine didn't use that pain as a learning lesson.

unlike other people, maurine used her pain for something poisonous. because she wanted to use her pain for revenge.

she wanted, so bad, to get back at the person who inflicted pain on her. she wanted to give back the pain to that person. and that person was luke hemmings.

i watched, little by little, as the girl i labelled as my best friend for years, who i always saw as the sweetest, most caring, and most understanding human being ever, become the most scheming, toxic, manipulative woman i ever knew.

during the time at prom, when we were at the balcony, she had so much hate in her eyes. so much toxicity at every word she spoke, almost as though she was spitting fire out. it broke my heart to see her that way, because the girl i saw that night was definitely not the girl i used to call my best friend.

because of pain, and the way she handled her pain, she became a whole new different person.

the girl i saw at the balcony during prom was not maurine. because the maurine i knew was this sweet, soft spoken girl who gave me her banana milk during the first day of elementary school.

VADA & MAURINE AT AGE 11

it's currently recess time, and since it's my first day of school, i'm sitting down with no one else other than ashton.

"i think it's great that we have each other." he says, smiling, as he takes a bite from his dinosaur-shaped chicken nugget.

"i don't know," i answer honestly, shrugging, "aren't you getting a bit sick of me? it's always the two of us, and no one else."

he frowns at this, looking at me as he does so.

"i'll never get sick of you," he says with a mouthful of food, "why? are you getting sick of me?"

"of course not!" i say straight away, "it's v and a forever and ever."

just as i had finished my sentence, this blond haired girl stands in front of our table, looking shy as she looks at ashton and i.

"hi." she says softly, a sweet smile on her face as she carries her pink bratz lunchbox.

"hey," i beam at her, "wanna sit down with us?"

"can i?" she asks with an excited look on her face, exchanging looks between ashton and i.

"sure!" i say instantly.