A little bit of love (boy x boy)

Chap 36. A little ray of light

  ' Lucas. Please call me back. I've been so worried. Where are you? You weren't at class. You weren't at school. Everyone said they haven't seen you since you took an early leave. Please just wherever you are, stay safe. ' 

  Beep. 

  That was the end of Alan's voice message. Lucas shuts his phone off with a sigh. 

  It's been.... three days... since he had gone from knowing nothing to knowing everything. Lucas's heart hurts like bitch. He skip schools, stay not home, not even going to see Luke in the hospital. 

  He couldn't even stand thinking about Luke. It'll bring back the writings on the letter and that is the biggest thing he's trying to avoid now. 

  Alan and Lucas's other friends were messaging and calling him like crazy. But he sent all of them to voicemail. He couldn't go to school now, he can't face his the students there anymore. 

  Lucas is currently laying on his bed, hugging the papers close to his chest. Somehow, he just couldn't put it down. Every time he tries to, he'll get worried and scared that it'll be gone the second he took his eyes of it. 

  ' Understand..... ' Lucas mutters. 

  ' I can't understand him. ' His voice was weak, clear that he has not been eating much or even drinking any water. ' Should I hate him? Should I forgive him? Should I.... pretend that I never read it? ' 

  Lucas has no idea. There are lots of choices for him to choose now because no one know that he'd read the letters, except for Mrs. Ward. But each of those choices leads to different endings and not of them are good ones. 

  So what kind of ending does Lucas want? Does he want Luke to regret more about his past decisions? Does he want Luke to not feel bad anymore because he wanted to forgive him? Or.... does he just want to continue his life without letting Luke know that he in fact, had read his thoughts?  

  That's what he's struggling now. He has time till Luke wakes up. Let's assume that the boy would. 

  Lucas tiredly got out of bed and made his way toward downstairs. Scanning the kitchen thoroughly, there isn't much to have for dinner. 

  A few packets of instant noddles, a small half - jar of Milo, eggs.... The only thing that Lucas knows how to cook is instant noddles since Luke was the always the one preparing food. 

  Lesson learnt from Lucas, don't rely on someone too much. Eventually one day, that person's going to leave and if you can't even learn the basic surviving skill like cooking, you wouldn't want to imagine how your life's going to be. Ain't pretty. 

  Lucas opens a packet of chicken favor instant noodles and started cooking. Everything was going well until the part where he debated whether or not to add in some eggs. As he crack the eggs and pour it in with the noodles, he instantly regrets it. 

  He switches off the gas and immediately backs away from it. 

  Luke. Eggs. 

  The two words flashed in his mind, bringing him back to the previous memories. Luke was teaching him how to cook instant noodles for the very first time. The image was clear, he couldn't wipe it off his head. 

  ' And last step, you can never forget some eggs. ' Luke jokes and pour a ready - stirred eggs into the pot. ' Instant noodles with eggs are literally one of the best things in the world. That is of course, what favor your noddles is first. ' Luke chuckles. 

  Lucas slump onto the dining chair with his hands automatically covering his face, he zip his lips tight so he could stop himself from crying. 

  For the past three days, everything Lucas did, saw or been to in the house is full of memories of Luke. When he was sitting on the couch watching television, he could as though someone was beside him. Or when he was sleeping, he could hear the sound of broken plates and things hitting the floor.