Play With Fire ~Zuko X Reader~

-25- What She Wants

"Hey," He was at my door, "Can I..?"

He gestured into the room, I nodded.

He sat on my bed, "How are you?"

"I don't know how to answer that. I'm slightly happy. I'm hurt. I'm overjoyed, and afraid."

He stood once more, making his way over to where I stood at the window, "What's wrong? Why are you afraid?"

I rolled my eyes, then leaned back against the wall, "Why wouldn't I be? Your father and sister are still at large. I have no idea about Mai and Ty Lee. Most of the team's allies are war prisoners. Sozin's comet is getting closer by the day. And on top of all that, I still can't bend."

The room was filled with suffocating silence. I could feel his eyes on me, while my eyes were closed.

"What do you want?"

My eyes flashed open, "What are you talking about?"

"What do you want? What do you fight for?"

"It's what my sister would have wanted, you know that."

He looked down, "That doesn't answer my first question. What do you want? When this is over, what do you plan to do?"

I laughed, turning back to look at Yue as she got ready for the night, "I don't know. The closest thing I had to plans for the future was proven impossible."

"What do you mean?"

I opened my eyes, "Do I have to say it? My only 'dream' was to live a happy life after the war. Live near you. Watch as you're happy with a family that loves you. Watch as both of us live a peaceful life. But that's just stupid. I learned back in Ba Sing Se that neither of us would be satisfied with that. I'd always feel like I failed someone. You would always want more. You would get bored of living happily. Then you would move on, leaving me in the dust all over again."

"Is that what this is about?"

I could feel bright red flames cut into my hands and wrists, I lashed at him, "Oh course that's what this is about! I know you're sorry right now. But I lost everything! I lost my teacher, my best friend, a chance at peaceful life, I lost..." My vision turned blurry as the flames dissipated, "I lost all hope that you would see the light. I thought you would leave me forever. I never wanted anything for myself. I wanted to do what my sister would have wanted. I wanted you to be truly happy. I wanted to fix this messed up world!"

"(Y/N)..."

"I can't even say your name! I'm hurt and I hate it! You left me. I ignored that fact, but now it's being shoved in my face! The reality only hit me after the eclipse."

By now I could feel tears escaping from closed eyes, I wasn't angry anymore, just... hurt, "I felt so... empty... Sure, I've made friends with Toph, Sokka, and the rest of the team, but it's not the same."

I looked up to see Zuko's face. It was covered in astonishment, and mixed with sadness.

I walked past, sitting on my bed, "I've followed you through everything, and you left me without a second thought. And the worst part is that I knew it was going to happen. I went with Toph and Sokka to try and stop the coup, because I knew that Azula was going to make you choose. And I knew you would choose the destiny your stupid father forced on you."

He was silent. He never did know how to cheer people up. He was always so awkward in a lot of social situations, it was one of the things I loved about him.

"Forget about it," I pulled my knees close to my chest, "It doesn't matter. I'm just butthurt. Everyone else has moved on, I should too."

He approached the bed, reaching out to comfort me. But he retracted his hand, not touching me, "It's fine. You have every right to be mad. You have every right to be hurt. You're human. You have wants and a purpose. I'm sorry if I never really acknowledged that before. Even when we were kids."