Truth (a Divergent Fanfic)

Chapter Twenty Eight

“If your heart wears thin I will hold you up 

And I will hide you when it gets too much.” ~ Beside You, Marianas Trench

*****

“I’m sorry.”

“Yeah. Me too.”

We stand apart, Callie and I, an awkward mixture of ‘I don’t want to touch you’ and ‘I really need to someone to hold’. I don’t try; it’s up to her to make the first move to fix our friendship now - I don’t want to scare her away. She wipes her tears off her face, which does nothing to stop the flood; it’s like trying to stop a river with a teaspoon.

I’m the first to bridge the silence. “So… what are we going to do now?”

Callie’s frizzy hair blows across her face and she pushes it out, frustrated. “I don’t know, Amber.”

And here, with Julian’s blood all over my hands and Eric gone again, is probably the most hopeless and purposeless I’ve felt in a while. Callie stands tall, defiant to the sky and angry, but I’m more uncertain than anything else. I had a plan, and now it’s been foiled; and I never was one to be spontaneous.

“Keep walking?” 

“Yeah okay.”

*****

We walk in silence for around five minutes, the only sound the thumps of our boots on the solid ground. We turn corner after corner after corner really just winging it because we don’t really know where we’re going. But maybe if we keep walking we’ll escape the demons and sadness and fire chasing behind us.

We’re just about to give up hope, we’re so lost, when we spot a signpost. A street name. And I remember where we are and start running, Callie close on my heel.

And finally, we hit the centre community - the town hall. It’s the local landmark and everyone knows where it is, including the both of us. I back up in a circle and look around. I can’t see any Dauntless guards but there is a circle of houses surrounding our location. Maybe if I was on higher ground. My eyes fall on the wall next to the community hall. It’s a stepped wall; if I could get onto the bottom part, I could probably climb right up onto the roof. It’s dangerous I know,and I have limited climbing abilities, but I have to try. For Julian. I owe it to him to save as many people as humanly possible. It’s what he would’ve wanted.

I struggle against the rough brick wall. It’s a little too high for me, and my upper body strength certainly won’t win any medals. If I could have a little boost, a leg up… I look back to Callie, who raises an eyebrow, the rest of her face stormy. 

“A little help?” She doesn’t move a muscle. “Fine.” I walk back to the wall, looking back to her just one last time to see a single tear running down her face and quickly being wiped away. But I see it.

After about five minutes, hands raw and clothes ripped, I’m up. The height is terrifying and dizzying but I force myself to keep climbing. I allow myself a breather at the top, looking down at the corrugated iron of the roof before I look around. And my plan worked - I can see everything. I call down to Callie, who is still staring at me, her face now a mixture of amazement and horror. “They’re on the third street on the left down that way.” I point out the road and she picks up the gun that I deposited at the foot of the wall, waiting for me to climb down. We run fast. There may not be much time left.