Her not so fortuitous Love

Chapter # 17

Aiden POV:-

I stood at the altar, waiting for my bride to come. My heart flickers with mixed emotions of anxiety and fear and somehow flutters happiness building inside of me too. But the distraught emotion of distress is much bigger. I don’t know why I am doing this, what good it will cause us to be bound in a loveless marriage, it will only bring despair but still, we both agree to it. Maybe I am still clinging onto that last ray of hope that is making me still believe that she still has a tiny shred of love for me and it is somewhere hidden in her heart and all I have to do is to find it but the cold front of hers is making me feel faint in dread. I stood at the altar with a blend of emotion but nothing can be done now, all I can do is to accept whatever I agree to bring upon myself, even if it is a loveless life. 

I was deep in thought but the doors opened and Jessica walked down the aisle with her father. Everything around me stopped when I looked at her, her beauty enhanced a million time when the veil was pulled over her face, the floor-length gown brushed against the floor, the straps of her beautiful dress swayed with each step she took closer, the sleeves of her off-shoulder gown made her so beguiling that I can’t even comprehend to anything but her. My eyes were fixed upon her as I felt deeply content to see her here, right before me as my bride. I couldn’t help to feel fortunate to have her as my bride, I cannot explain my elation. 

She reached the altar as I offered my hand to her, her father looked at me and said, “I am giving my treasure to you.”

“And I am offering my life to her,” I said earnestly, Jessica looked at me with a glint of astonishment at my words but I just passed her a smile as we stood at the altar. 

We exchanged our rings and it was the time to say our vow, it took me a lot of time to convince Jessica to write our own vows but in the end, she finally agreed and I am excited about mine because I wrote what I wanted to tell her. 

She stood there with her gaze fixed on the ground as I can see that she is nervous. I continued to look at her lovingly and spoke my words, 

“...I will try my best to make each upcoming moment of our lives memorable. I promise to hold you close to me till my last breath…”

After I finished my vows, I looked at her intensely, curious to know what she had written for me. She took a deep breath and began to say,

“...My love might be not so fortuitous but I promise to stay with you and share every tear and smile together, overcoming all obstacles and turning our relationship into an everlasting source of salvation…” 

Her words left me speechless, I never thought she’ll think of something like this and at that moment I even want her vow to be true, I want to spend every moment with her and make it everlasting and turn it into something we can never forget even if I die. 

“I pronounce you as the man and the wife. You May now kiss the bride.” The priest announced as I lifted her veil and looked at her, she seemed slightly distressed, she couldn’t meet my gaze. I can sense her getting tense. My heart clenched when I saw her like this, my heart burst from pain but I lifted my gaze and lifted her chin and made her look at me. She looked at me with a hint of sadness. I felt heartbroken as I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply as her sweet scent intoxicated me but I held it inside me and pressed my lips upon her. I gave her lips a quick peck and pulled away. When it doesn't help any deep emotion then why would I take out my urges, I don’t want to force her. 

The crowd was disappointed but then soon they began to cheer. We walked down the aisle, I held her hand in mine. Everything happens at their pace, I should give us some time, we have a lifetime for us, no need to rush things. When the time to part came, Jessica cried hard while hugging her parents. I felt sad, just how hard it would be for a girl to leave her everything behind and go to a new place. 

“Please take care of her, Aiden,” Aunt said, wiping her tears. I smiled and gave Jessica a side hug and replied, “I will try my best to give her every happiness I can.” 

***

I felt awkward, like really awkward. It’s our wedding night and how can I spend the night with the person whom I cannot even kiss with affection? Just how difficult it would be for me and her? I sighed deeply and went to my- our room. Just how things changed in one day, my name is attached to hers, my room becomes ours, my whole being is now connected to her. But, one thing is sure, I don’t regret my decision to marry her. No matter how difficult it would be for me to reach her heart or no matter what happens, I’ll hold her close to me and never let go, I’ll not let her go like before. 

I entered and saw Jessica sitting on the bed looking stoic. when I entered, she shot her head at me and looked at me with a hint of nervousness and slight dismay. she turned her head away as i walked close and sat beside her. A smile crept upon my lips and I turned my head to look at her. I held her hand as she shyly looked at me, her uneasy eyes looked at everything around the room but me. I continued to look at her in fondness and stroke her hands gently and called her, “Jessica…” She slowly lifted her gaze and met mine. I lovingly leaned in close and moved my other hand close to her cheeks and caressed them with the back of my palm. 

“You came in my life like a Goddess and today, you are looking like one.” A faint smile crept upon her lips as she replied in a whisper, “Thank you.” I smile widely and I was about to lean in to kiss her cheek but they looked at her eyes which held no positive emotion of affection in them. A needle pricked my heart but I didn’t react as I pulled my hands away from her slowly as I held desire to touch her again but I held this inside of me. 

“Uh... Jessica..” I trailed off feeling nervous and awkward. A sudden tension spread in the air and to lower it, I stuttered, 

“Y-You should c-change. T-the dress m-must be heavy.” She didn't do a thing and stopped and left to the closet. When she left for the bathroom I also left the room. I went to the room top and leaned on the wall. 

“I wish I never loved you.” Her words came to my mind as it caused a commotion in them, giving me extreme consternation. I made her like this, her love for me made her cold. If I didn’t neglect her back then and realized my feeling soon, today would be the most mesmerizing night of our lives, even if I said bluntly rather than finding excuse she could also have recovered from the scar of rejection, but right now, her coldness is making me feel what she would have felt that time. I curled my hands in a fist and remained like that for I don’t know how long.

After a while, I entered our room and saw her sleeping peacefully on the bed. My lips curved upwards as I walked to her and sat on my side. I stared at her slumbering for about a minute as a strand of her hair fell on her face. I moved my hand close to her and stroked her cheeks as I didn't pull my hand back like last time. Nothing pulled my back, it felt like every inch of my core wants to touch her now, is it because we are married. Of course, it is because we are married. That's the only consolation to myself, I know that actual reason but, I know I will not accept it now. 

I tugged the strand of her hairs behind her ears as I laid down too and faced her. I smiled widely when I looked at him. At least she doesn’t have any problem with sharing the bed with me. I wrapped my arms around her and spent the rest of my night with her in my embrace feeling the immense sensation of allure for her.