Barba's Secret Family(SVU story)

Chapter 21

It's been a few days since Rafael and I have talked. I have another appointment soon and I want him to come but I know he's busy with work. I sighed as I got up and noticed it was early morning. I looked over and saw that Rafael was still asleep. But it was only 4 in the morning and my appointment wasn't until 12pm. Not being able to sleep, I got up from out bed and went to the kitchen to make some tea to hoped calm my nerves. How were we going to do it? How were we going to raise four kids? I mean Rafael often works late and I barely work. Am I a bad mother if I don't want these two right now, but at the same time I do? Sighing I warmed up my tea and laid down on the couch. Setting my cup down once I was finished i tried to go back to sleep, but couldn't. I laid there until about 6:30 when I heard Rafael scrambling to get ready and head out the door.
"Leaving already?"
"I'm sorry love, but I have to see what I can do about your ex. That trial is coming up soon unless he decides on a plea deal."
"Rafael I don't want to go to trial. Can we just forget about this?" I asked not wanting to stress about this situation especially with two more kids on the way.
"How can we forget about this? After what that ex of yours did to you?!" Rafael raised his voice. I flinched and backed up scared he hardly ever raised his voice.
"I'm sorry love, but I just can't drop this." Rafael said and kissed my lips.
"I understand. Can you take an early lunch though? I have to go to the doctors today and we can find out the genders, but I wanted you there."
"I'll see what I can do. I'll text you a little before if I can."
"Okay. Can you ask your mom if she wouldn't mind watching the kids while we go?"
"I'll text her and let her know." Rafael said and kissed me once more and left.
How were we going to do this? I thought and laid down on the couch to try to get some sleep until my appointment.