Julius and I arrive the next morning at a dump outside central London. I have to constantly hold Iggy's hand because he is blind and deaf and since Julius does not want to become gay again and hold a guy's hand.
"This place smells like ur breath," Julius says to me. I love when he talks dirty to me. Meow.
Off to the right, there is a blue box and Julius thinks it must be the Fartis that Doc McStuffins was talking about. It takes us 1.37 hours to reach the ugly thing because Iggy is an uncoordinated poop and I am immensely large.
When we get to the top, Julius knocks on the door and a creepy old guy in booty shorts and a rainbow vest answers. He has grey hair all over his body except how bare chest which is dyed pink like Iggy's lawn.
"Hello, Mr. Who," I say as politely as I could without expressing what I thought of his eccentricness. "Doc McStuffins gave us ur address and we were hoping you could help fur our blind, deaf, and, partially autistic friend." In a feminine, valley girl voice, he replies,"Yas, gurl. YaS." Dr. Who invites us inside. When The Do for turns around, Julius starts to cry because his booty will never be as full and luscious as his.
Iggy and my delicious friend with benefits are able to get in, but the Fartis does not expand enough to for my many rolls, so instead I wait outside.
updated January 1st 2015
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The Fault in our Moons
Fanfic"Maybe Okie Dokie will be our 5ever." "Some booties are bigger than other booties" Young Cashew, newly sixteen, falls into unconditional love when she happens to cross paths with one Julius Oceans. This epic tale of love is filled with humor and hea...
