The Other Wayland

Lost Memories

Elizabeth POV

It had been a few days since I had emerged from the meadow. Since then I had only seen a few people, my father, someone he addressed as queen and two young women who brought me food and water.

"An old friend has come to visit, Elizabeth," My father announced as he walked towards me. I nodded. "His name is Magnus and he looked after you when you were little." I looked beyond him to where an extravagantly dressed man stood. He waved at me but he seemed sad.

"Hello Button, it's good to see you awake," He said smiling. "May I come sit with you?"  I nodded and motioned to the free space on the bed I was sat on. He sat opposite me so he could see my face.

"Why do you call me button? My name is Elizabeth," I asked curious.

He smiled sadly, "When I first met you  you were a tiny little girl and I thought you were as cute as a button,"

"Oh," I said. It seemed as if I should know this man. I felt like I did, I felt comfortable with him but I couldn't seem to figure out why. "How long have we known each other?"

"Almost seven years," He said, "I was asked to help you when you came to the Clave. You were very scared and you need some help to stop being scared,"

"That's a long time. I...um... I'm... I can't remember that," I said quietly.

"That's okay, I'm here to help you remember," He told me, "Can you tell me what you do remember?"

"I remember the meadow. I was in a meadow by myself  and there was a door. I went through the door and woke up here," I shrugged.

"What about anything before that?" He asked. I closed my eyes and tried to think. I tried to pull anything I could from inside the mess of my mind. I shook my head and he nodded. "That's okay. How about this? I'm going to show you some pictures and you see if you can tell me their names?" I nodded. He pulled out a stack of pictures and laid them out in front of me. "Do you recognise any of these?"

I looked carefully at the photos in front of me. There were two girls, one with dark hair and one with ginger hair. A boy with dark hair and blues eyes, another boy with blond hair and golden eyes and a third boy, he looked younger, he had the most beautiful grey eyes and a curly mop of dirty blond hair. I felt drawn to this one. "This boy, I feel like I know this one, I can't... What's his name?"

"Joe? That's Joseph Linscott. You and him have been together since you were children." He replied, picking up the photo. "I thought his face might spark something, young love and all that,"

"And this one," I pointed to the blond one. "I know this one too, for a long time I think."

"Ah yes, Jonathan. He's your brother." Magnus said delighted. "This is good Elizabeth," He looked down at the pictures again. "So the rest here are, Clary she's your sister, I think. It's confusing. Then there's Isabelle and her brother Alexander," He smiled as he picked up his photo. "You live with them. Alexander is your brother's parabatai, his best friend." 

"I don't remember anything about those people," I said quietly, "You said this one is my sister?" I asked pointing to the ginger girl, "She doesn't look like me at all," 

Magnus laughed a little, "She's not your biological sister, I don't think so anyway. Valentine, the man that made you ill, he took your mother in while she was pregnant with you. She was only a young teen and her relationship with your father was a secret. Valentine experimented on you before you were born. He then raised you as his own child with your brother Jace," 

"That sounds complicated," I said sighing looking at all the photos on the bed again. I picked up the photo of Joe once more and looked at him more carefully. He was a beautiful boy, he was smiling and he looked incredibly happy, his eyes seemed to be shinning even through the photo, looking at him made me feel happy. "Can you tell me about him?" I asked Magnus looking back up at him. 

"Joe?" He asked, I nodded and handed him the photo, "You and Joe have been together for the last six years. You were put together after it was thought that Valentine had died. He is very attached to you, you two were inseparable. He is one of the most talented swordsmen his age, he is kind and funny. He's incredibly intelligent too. He gets annoyed because I often ask him to run errands for me even though I can do it easily myself. He is very loyal and he cares deeply about the people in his life." It felt strange getting told about a person whose face I seemed to know so well but who I didn't know at all.

"And my brother, Jace?" I asked picking up the photo of the blond boy. 

"I don't know him very well, he seems to care about you a lot but the two of you have only just reunited recently. You two were separated after you were placed into the care of the Clave," He said, "You have a lot of people who care about you,"   He was silent for a minute and I didn't know to respond. I didn't remember these people. I didn't know if I cared about them too. I barely even knew who I was.

"Everyone keeps telling me that I am this person and that I've done all these things but I can't remember any of that. I don't know what I'm supposed to do," I admitted. My father was constantly trying to get me to tell him anything I could remember and the queen women kept telling about how I was a great warrior and that's why she'd saved me.

He took my hand in his and squeezed it, "I can't imagine how difficult this must be but the only thing you have to do is focus on getting better," I nodded, "How are you feeling?"

"I'm in a lot of pain," I shrugged, "All the time. It's constant. I can't sleep, I have nightmares all night."

He hummed and the spoke again, "If it's okay with you, I will come and visit you in a few days with something to help. Anything else you can tell me?"

"I feel extremely weak," I said casually. I was debating on whether to tell him about the other thing too.

"Hopefully with rest and gentle work that one should ease with time," Magnus said happily. "It doesn't seem like there isn't any permanent damage,"

"Well, there is another thing," I said quietly, not looking at him directly.

"Oh?"

"I have this urge to... to do bad things... to hurt people. I see the weapons that my father carries and I think about how easy it would be to steal them and stab him or the ladies will bring a bath for me to bathe in and I see a vision of me drowning them in it," I said disgusted with myself.

"Okay Button, that one, that one I have no answers for. Leave it with me, no doubt I can find something in one of my books," He patted my hand, "Everything is going to be okay," I nodded. "I should be going, you need rest and I've probably overwhelmed you too much already," He smiled uncomfortably.

"Okay. Thank you for coming to visit me and for showing me these," I said 
motioning to the photos.

"It's my pleasure, and you keep these. They might bring something back if you stare at them long enough," He joked.

"You should take this one. I think you'd have more use for it than me," I said handing him the one of the dark hard boy.

"I... How?" He asked shocked.

"Call it an instinct," I smiled, "I will see you soon Magnus," I said to him.

"Yes," He said hurriedly, "I will be back in a few days, hopefully with something to help you," He rushed off after that and I smiled watching him go.

"Elizabeth, I've brought you lunch," My father called from the edge of the clearing. I tucked the photos under my pillow and waited for my father.

"How did that go?" He asked as he placed a tray between us.

"It went well, Magnus seems to be a lovely man," I said before making a start on the salad he'd brought me.

"Yes. I believe he is. I am sure he will have you right as rain before you can say your name," Father smiled and we fell back into our newly normal routine as if Magnus had never visited.