There's Something About Christmas That Makes You Wanna Fall In love.

Chapter 10

My brother passed away three days later. It was very hard and especially that he passed away two days before his birthday and Christmas. I was getting ready for the funeral and so was my mum. I wore black jeans and a black t-shirt, did my hair in a bun and took my scarf and jacket. My mum called me.

‘’Sweetie, are you ready?’’

‘’Yes, mum.’’

My mum saw that I wasn’t well and I had tears in my eyes. She took my face in her holds and told me, ‘’I know you are crying from inside but believe me sweetie, I know your brother wouldn’t want to see you like this.’’

‘’I can’t mum, it’s just so hard and I wanna talk about it with someone but I can’t, because words can’t describe how I feel inside,’’ and I started crying.

‘’I know sweetie, but we have to deal with it and I know it will take days, even months to get over it, but you have to stay strong for me and him and especially for yourself.’’

‘’I know, mum.’’

‘’Now let’s go or we will be late. Did you bring the speech you will present?’’

‘’Yes, I did mum.’’

We went out and got a cab and on my way all I thought about was the speech and how hard it would be to talk about it in front of so many people.

Nichlous, Stella, Stefania and Jason were there.

‘’Hey, Bella how are you feeling?’’ Nichlous asked.

‘’I am okay. How are you guys?’’

‘’We are all good’’ They all answered.

‘’Okay, I will probably see you later guys, I will have to go and see my mum.’’

‘’Okay, Bella,’’ they all said.

‘’Bella,’’ Nichlous cried out, ”Good luck with your speech, I know it will be great, we are with you.’’

‘’Thank you,’’ I said and I hugged him.

The funeral was in a place near the forest and all of my mum’s friends and my friends were there. They all sat down. Jason, Stefania, Nichlous and Stella were in the front row where I had reserved a place for them. I sat beside my mum on the other side of the row of chairs. It was my turn to make a speech. I stood up, took my paper and stood in the front of all the people.

‘’My brother was one of the people who had a huge impact on me, and even though he was a little man and he didn’t experience much of life, he made a huge change in my life and I wish I could have him back, although I know I can’t. I would give my soul to have him back and enjoy the little times we shared and Christmas together. I wish I could have seen him grow up and I wish I could have shared all my life with him, but I know it’s too late and that he is somewhere better now.
My brother - the hardest part wasn’t losing you, it was learning how to live without you. I wish heaven had a phone so I could hear your voice again. I thought of you today, but that is nothing new. I thought about you yesterday, and the days before too. I think of you in silence, I often speak your name. All I have are memories and a photo in a frame. Your memory is a keepsake, from which I’ll never part. God has you in his arms and I have you in my heart.”

They all clapped and my mum had tears in her eyes. They stood up and all the friends of my mum hugged me. Stefania, Stella, Jason and Nichlous came and hugged me.

‘’We are sorry, Bella,’’ they said.

‘’It’s okay guys.’’

‘’We will go and grab some lunch, you wanna come?’’ Jason said.

‘’No, thank you guys, I am okay.’’

My mum came from behind me and said ‘’Why don’t you go with them, Bella?’’

‘’I don’t want to mum, I am not really in the mood.’’

‘’Okay, sweetie, as you wish.’’

Everyone left. Nichlous, Jason, Stefania and Stella said they will see me at school, I thanked them for coming and they also left.

My mum and I went back home. I didn’t really feel like doing anything, I just wanted to lie in bed.

‘’Mum, I will go and lie down in bed, okay?’’

‘’Okay, sweetie, you should have a rest… too many emotions in one day.’’

She hugged me tight and whispered, ‘’Be strong sweetie, I know it’s hard but your brother wouldn’t want to see you like this.’’

I went into my room, closed the door and lay down, all my thoughts were about my brother, thinking how would I be able to just walk into the house everyday without seeing him or going with him to the ice-cream shop, or even going with him and dropping him at the kindergarden. All these thoughts were just in my head and I started crying.  My last thought was that I now have an angel by my side.