Whilst you were gone.. ('The Irish Girl' Sequel) (DG fanfic)

Chapter 20: Just friends, with benefits

I barely slept that night, I took some pain killers for my hand and didn't take my medication as too much in my system could cause me damage. And I'm already damaged enough, so I decided to sit in the garden.
The sky was dark blue, and it was five in the morning.
I only slept an hour, the pain in my chest made a full return. I was slowly turning into the zombie again, thanks to Liam. "Can't sleep?" Ryan asked from behind me, making me jump. "God almighty Ryan! Stop doing that!" I gasped with my hand on my chest and he laughed "I love freaking you out" he said proudly as he sat beside me, I asked Stevie for a pack of cigarettes whilst I went out for a walk last night and he gave me a sliver lighter. I didn't tell him why or the next time I see Liam will be in the morgue.
Yes, I'm smoking again. I knew I'd crack, and Liam helped trigger my cravings. I put the cigarette in my mouth and lit it up.
"Smoking again?" Ryan asked as I took a drag and blew the smoke in his face, "What does it look like captain obvious?" I replied sarcastically, Ryan blew away the smoke with his hand and said "Well, I'm not judging you" Ryan said and I scoffed "Well, I don't care if you do" My attitude never changed but I only seemed to have one when I'm mad, "Liam is an idiot for what he did blue eyes" Ryan said and I laughed "If you think this is like one of those movies where you get to play the guy who steals the girl with a broken heart, your wrong and that is not how you get into a girls pants, just for the record" I clarified and Ryan laughed it off as usual, "Whatever you say blue eyes, whatever you say" and I chuckled "You calling me blue eyes is just as annoying as Stevie calling me rover" I remembered I didn't tell Ryan about that nickname and he burst out laughing "Rover? Is that a dogs name? Aha!" I huffed and rolled my eyes "Yeah yeah laugh it up" I took one final drag and I put it out on the wall behind me, "Aren't you a little afraid mike and may-li might see that?" Ryan asked and I scoffed "I don't care if they do, I've nothing to loose" I leant my head on his shoulder and sighed, Ryan played with my hair. "I just wish it was easier, I could have Liam back and things would be the same as we left them but I was wrong" I said in self pity and Ryan replied "Chloe, it's his loss, he lied to you. You've tried so hard to get yourself back up, don't beat yourself up" and I smiled "Thanks Ryan, you've really been a big help lately" and it's true, even though Ryan can be a dick sometimes he's kept me somewhat sane. "Glad I have, but I think you should get your own back on him" Ryan suggested and I lifted my head up, "How?" I asked and he winked at me, "I could be your fake boyfriend" and I laughed whilst I was considering it, "Ryan, if we do that then you've just signed your own death warrant" and he raised his eyebrow at me "You think I can't take him?" He said competitively and I chuckled "You don't know liam like I do, he's got just as bad of a temper than I" and it's was bad sometimes, and I don't like the idea of Liam and Ryan fighting over me. "Well, I'm not afraid Chloe, but we could start dating for real if you want" Ryan hinted further and I twisted my lips and said "We could fake date like you said, but you don't go to the same college" and Ryan smirked "Well, luckily I got a place at the same one" and I gasped "Are you stalking me?" And Ryan said "No! I don't want to die do I?" And I smiled "I'm glad anyway, at least I'll know one person" I knew what I was doing was bad but what other option did I have? Liam knows I hate liars and you don't cross me.
Ryan leant in to kiss me and I held my hand up, "Woah slow down Romeo, I didn't mean now" I secretly wanted him to, I was just teasing him. "We've got to work on our chemistry, who's going to believe us if we don't make it look real and besides we've kissed before so it's nothing we've not done before blue eyes" he wasn't wrong and I said "Well, we could fake date but if we're going to act we might as well rehearse" I kissed him and I'll have to admit, when I kissed Ryan I felt better for some reason. He's worse than nicotine, he leaves me wanting more and I don't regret it.
I would usually feel bad for Liam but I don't anymore, I feel good. "We best go back inside before mike and may-li come back" I said as pulled away and Ryan smiled "I meant what I said when I told you I loved you, hopefully you'll learn to feel the same" I said "Well, you know how I feel Ryan. I'm not telling you again but let's not kill the mood please" and Ryan nodded and left that conversation for another day.
I went back upstairs to catch up on sleep Ryan followed and decided to join me. I'll admit I enjoyed sleeping in his arms, and hearing him talk makes me feel calm.
We spent an hour extra in bed. I set my alarm for 7:30 giving me enough time to grab a shower and eat breakfast, Mike came back around six.
I woke up and Ryan was still sleeping, undisturbed by my alarm. I left him in my bed and went for a shower, I took my clothes in with me just incase Ryan wakes up and sees me naked and gets the wrong idea. I left that thought and after I dried my hair and did my makeup, I got changed.
(FYI, the model in the photo isn't Chloe 😂)