Supernatural Imagines

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Hi guys. 

So it's been a while. I kinda left you guys on read, huh? I promise that I am infact writing for this book and well as others that I haven't published yet. 

I know every few months that I come on here with a long rant and a promise to start writing more. And every time I believe myself when I send those messages. 

I don't know what I am doing anymore. 

Super duper honestly time guys. 

Don't get me wrong, I love writing. Writing is my passion and I would love to turn it into a career. Being on a best-seller list, book tours; I dream of the whole thing. 

So what's stopping me from writing and keeping myself accountable?

I can't really answer that for you. 

Life has been horrible this past year. Not just for me, but it seems like the whole freaking world. People are dying, people don't believe that Covid is an actually thing and it's just a political game, Jenna Marbles left Youtube, and my dog fucking died. 

Great year to be alive, huh?

I'm sorry if I am triggering any of you, I really am. But I'm done. I'm so tired of living in my small fucking town. I am tired of not being able to love who I want to love. I am tired of being TIRED. I wake up everyday wishing I hadn't and have no energy and no motivation to do anything. And then when I finally feel like doing something, someone says something to me and I'm back at square one.

I try everyday to feel something, desperately trying to fight the numbness or the sadness that swirls in my empty head. 

So while I love writing this book and I love the feedback I get back from all of you. And trust me, I do read your comments. I see you little shits in the comments making jokes and it makes my day to see that. I've always loved this SPN community we have. 

So the point of all this? Who the hell knows? 

I'm trying, and I think I just needed someone to believe me when I'm saying it. Cause I sure as hell don't believe myself. 

So I promise the next chapter and last chapter of the Doctor Who crossover will be out soon. And maybe a book about Balthazar is in the works? ;)

Some maybe this was some desperate reach at validation. Don't feel obligated to do anything with this chapter. I just wanted to someone to hear me. 

Love you all. 

-Chells.