friends with benefits - draco malfoy

chapter eight

me and draco walked in to the defence against the dark arts together the next day. he made me walk behind him, using his body as if he was trying to shield me from umbridge's gaze. he walked over to my desk and looked at blaise harshly 'swap seats with me' he said to him firmly.
'what?' blaise replied, laughing a little 'no'.
'blaise i mean it' draco hissed back 'swap seats with me or i'll tell everyone about what happened to you in the bathroom of our first quidditch game'. blaise looked at him, clearly trying to determine if he was serious or not, before standing up and slamming his books on the table. 'whatever' blaise snarled, grabbing his stuff and storming over to sit next to pansy, who promptly turned around and stared at me with a furious expression on her face. 'what did happen in the bathrooms' i whispered to draco and he turned to me with a smirk. 'well i can't tell you can i? i promised blaise i wouldn't tell if he moved' draco laughed, 'and i always keep my promises'.

i was just debating what excuse to give draco for meeting up with harry and the others tonight when umbridge cleared her throat and answered my prayers 'can all prefects see me tonight at 6? i have something i need to discuss'. draco groaned and looked at me 'im so sorry, i know we were meant to hang out tonight'.
'it's okay' i responded careful to sound disappointed, 'i'll just have a night in my room and catch up on some homework'. he smiled at me and turned back to his work. i caught harry's eye across the class, nodding to signal to him that i'd be there and he grinned back at me. it was our first lesson with the younger years today, and even though i knew i couldn't tell draco i felt so guilty keeping this a secret from him when he was trying so hard to be nice to me. but common sense won this battle time and time again and i knew that draco was a prefect, one way or another he would end up letting on to umbridge. draco nudged me, clearly hinting to me that i needed to stop daydreaming and start working because umbridge was staring at me. he turned his book towards me, letting me copy down the answers he had so far. the class ended and he grinned at me 'i'll see you later okay? i gotta run i have charms class next and i'll get killed if i'm late again'
'sure' i smiled back at him.

i wasn't used to this sudden change in dracos personality, it was everything i'd hoped for since the first time we had sex but now it had finally happened i wasn't sure it was real. i probably would have got myself seriously injured sooner if i knew this would be the outcome i thought to myself, trying not to laugh. i still didn't trust this new personality of his though, part of me felt like it was all some big trick. draco had always been like this, he could be so charming and caring at times, but he could also snap and treat you like shit. sometimes it was like his brain just switched off from the outside world, like he was so deep in thought that he stopped caring about everything. it had been nearly a year since the first time i hooked up with him, and even from the first time i'd said never again.

the first time
i walked in to the common room, freezing from the cold outside and looking forward to warming myself up by the fire. i stopped in disappointment, seeing draco malfoy already sitting on the sofa opposite. i retreated slightly, about to turn around when he looked up from the book he was reading 'come sit down if you want, i'm not stopped you' he said cooly 'i don't bite'. embarrassed that he'd caught me about to leave when i saw him, i walked over and sat down sheepishly on the opposite end of the couch to him. 'what are you reading' i asked awkwardly, trying to break the silence 'just a book my father sent me, it's pretty boring' he replied, looking up at me and giving me his famous smirk. 'god you look freezing' he said 'here' and he passed me his jacket that had been lying on the sofa arm next to him. 'thanks' i'd replied, wrapping it around my arms gratefully. i looked up at him again, unnerved that he was still staring at me 'what?' i asked, giggling nervously. 'you're so beautiful' he said, shuffling closer to me on the sofa 'oh um, thanks' i said laughing and taking it as a joke. 'no seriously' he said, raising his eyebrows and flicking his eyes down to my lips 'how have i never noticed before'. i shrugged awkwardly, all too aware of how close his face was. draco was beautiful himself, but i was all too aware of the reputation he had, everyone was. 'well, i should probably head back to my dorm' i said, but not making any effort to pull away. 'yeah' he breathed, reaching his hand up tracing his fingers along my jaw. i felt the cool of his rings press against me skin and i gulped. 'you probably should'. and then he kissed me and everything turned in to a blur.

i didn't even tell him i was a virgin. what was just another mindless fuck to him was my first time for me. i woke up well before draco, and managed to convince myself that maybe he really liked me, and it would all be okay. by the time he stirred i was half expecting him to wake up and claim his undying love for me, so i was slightly off put when he opened his eyes and abruptly pulled away from me. 'what are you still doing in my room' he had hissed furiously 'you do realise that someone will have noticed you weren't in your room last night'. i got up and rushed back to my dorm, managing to hold in the tears until i was in the shower. i cried, staring at the shower wall, promising myself never again.