Trusting The Alpha

Chapter 1

Now

"How have you been feeling Selene?" Doctor Augustine Hayes asks me, drawing my attention away from a painting on her wall and back to her. She pushes her glasses   her beak-like nose and stares at me with her dull brown eyes waiting for a response.

"Not too bad actually. Trying to move on you know? I think these sessions are helping a bit." I answer, playing with my fingers.

"And how are you sleeping?  Are you still having nightmares?" Of course, I am. That'll never change.

"Yeah. Sometimes they are not so bad and other times I wake up screaming. I've been seeing you for a year now and even though I know Liam is in jail and I am perfectly safe. I still can't sleep." I tell her.

"Have you tried the breathing exercises that we have talked about?" She asks me as she scribbles something in her notepad.

"Yes, I have but they don't stop the nightmares. I always wake up feeling like there is an elephant on my chest and that someone is watching me. Silly after all this time."

"It's not silly at all Selene, it is perfectly normal what you are going through." She says. I look away from her scanning the room, the beige walls holding various pictures some from her other patients- children who colored for her, a few from her travels but there is one picture that gets my attention every time I come in, a wolf, jet black with bright green eyes. Someone was awfully close to get this picture, they are lucky they were not mauled. I think, turn my attention back to Doctor Hayes who is looking at me with a soft smile; waiting to finish.

"I'm sorry." I mutter.

"It's quite alright. As I was saying you have been through a very traumatic experience and the fact that your attacker was your foster brother only made matters worse. You are an extraordinarily strong woman Selene, to have gone through what you did alone. I believe that you are demonstrating classic signs of PTSD or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, it is quite common after a traumatic event." She tells me.

"PTSD? I wasn't in war, I was raped." I reply harshly. Maybe a war in my own home but it is not the same.

"You don't have to be in a war to experience PTSD. It is a mental disorder Selene. It can happen. I want you to try this medication, it is an antidepressant and it will help with what you are going through." She says getting up and going to her desk, pulling out her prescription pad and writing on it. She hands it to me and looks down at her watch, sighing. "That is all the time we have for today. By the way how is work? Any word about the promotion?" She asks me, walking me to the door, she is talking about the raise I have been working towards for the past 3 months at Chicago Tribune for Journalism.

"It is good, I should be hearing something any day now." I say smiling.

"That is great Selene, I know how hard you have worked for this. I wish you all the best." She smiles sweetly at me.

"Thank you so much Doctor Hayes. Bye." I walk out of her office and walk to the front door,

"Oh Selene!" She calls out and I turn to her, "Don't forget that we will not be meeting next week." I look at her confused until I remember why.

"Oh right, you're getting married! The date came quick."

"Yes, but if you need anything you can always call or text me you have my number." She replies, "Oh my next appointment is here." I step out of the way as an older man pulls the door open and walks into her office without a word, a frigid wind following behind him.

"Congratulations Doc." I say, pulling my coat around me tighter.

"Thank you. Have a good day Selene." She says retreating into her office. I step out into snow filled parking lot and walk fast but careful to my car. I jack up the heat and wait for it, putting my phone in the stand on the dashboard before pulling out of the parking lot. I drive down the same familiar road to the Tribune, having a half hour until I must be here. My phone chimes with a message from a private number: I see you.  It reads and my heart stops as I start scanning the parking lot of the building, looking for anyone out of the ordinary.